Leslie and I chose an extremely exotic location for our interview- the Hyde Park Shop!  Give us a break- she’s a busy gal (as you will soon learn) and this is what we were able to fit into both of our schedules.  Leslie was slowly sipping some delicious green tea and I was unable to drink anything owing to the fact that my jaw was on the floor upon learning just how much fitness and wellness in general this woman packs into her life.  Take a deep breath and enjoy my friends!

Leslie Hall: Do you mind if I periodically pour tea throughout the interview?  I brought back-up *pulls out thermos in addition to her coffee mug

Coach Chad: Absolutely, that is a clutch move.  What are you drinking?

This is ceremonial-grade matcha tea that I make every morning.  I can’t drink coffee anymore, but I think it has a lot of caffeine in it, but also other antioxidants and stuff.

Yeah!  I used to run the Whole Body department at a Whole Foods in Chicago, so I’m well versed in green teas and green tea supplements-

Right!  Did you know you’re the reason I take digestive enzymes?

That is awesome!  I only take them if we’re going to eat something way out of our diet like pizza, but I notice a big difference if I don’t take them.

I definitely notice a difference.  I take them now with every meal.

Cool!  I have some juicy questions that the other coaches wanted me to ask you, but the first thing I wanted to do is get a little back story on you.  Tell me and the readers the nickel version of Leslie.

Alright!  I’m originally from New Hampshire.  I grew up there, hated the cold, graduated from college and then moved to Honolulu for three years.

Oh!  Did you have a job out there?

Yep, I worked at the University of Hawaii doing social and behavioral research.  I also worked as a sexual violence educator at a non profit.  I did that and I was missing my family and then I moved to DC to go to grad school.  I lived there for 11 years and got into tech and that is where I met (her husband) Graham- we worked together.  Right after we got married we moved to Austin in 2015.  

What did you get your masters in?

Sociology.  Yeah, we lived here for a year and were following Eater articles to try and find the best coffee shop in Austin in order to figure out where we wanted to live.  We went to Quacks because it was in one of the articles.  We didn’t even know what Hyde Park was but we bought a house there and we discovered Dane’s because we were just walking around the neighborhood.

Nice!  And you’re still in Hyde Park?

Yep, same house!

That is a nice table setting for the first question from a coach I wanted to throw your way.  It comes from Autumn- and you’ve been doing some personal training work with her right?

Yes!  So, Autumn is amazing.  On New Year’s Eve 2020 I went to swim practice -I’m on the UT masters swim team- and we had this awesome 2 hour practice.  I sat down for a cup of tea and didn’t stand up again straight for 4 months because I hurt my back really badly. It was all because my core was really weak- I had no idea.  (Autumn) fundamentally changed the way I think about exercise and the ability to control my core so I could still come to Dane’s.  She changed my life.  So I see her now once a month so I don’t have to go to PT.  I highly recommend anyone having issues engaging their core going to Autumn.

She’s kind of a master at it.

I also always have a goal.  Currently it is doing a push up, doing a pull up and doing a handstand. She gives me ways to work on those. 

That’s cool, you’re impressed with her and she is impressed with you.  Specifically, she mentioned that she is impressed that you have causes you are enthusiastic about and that you actually do something about it- you take action.  She wanted to know how you would advise others to do the same, but before you do that I want you to give some examples of causes you’ve been in to

Sure.  I am a big believer in equal rights for everyone no matter what.  I was really involved in some nonprofits in DC and wanted to figure out how to do that here.  It probably isn’t surprising for anyone who knows me that my beliefs don’t exactly align with that of the Texas legislature.  When SB8 and some of the other anti-trans bills came down I really wanted to do something to combat it.  I put a feeler out on instagram for groups that I could work with and got some good suggestions that I could research more.  So now I’m doing things like letter writing, phone banking, postcard writing; I joined Texas Blue Action and went to their advocacy day.  I also just learned what “dropping a card” is-

Ummhm, I just learned that too.  Can you talk a bit about what that is?

When a bill goes into the committee to see if it is going to come up for a full vote or not, they have people come in and testify.  As part of testifying, you can just say you agree or disagree.  So dropping a card is just a way of formally saying you agree or not with that bill.  My next goal is to actually testify in front of a committee.  

So what is your best piece of advice for someone who wants to get involved more?

I would say just to put out in your network what sort of organizations might align with your values.  Just ask around.  Organizations usually just have more ways to get involved.  Or you can reach out to me!  I’m happy to help.

That is wonderful!  Turning things inward a little bit, one of Blair’s questions was- you’re doing a meditation challenge?

*Laughing* Yes!  I’m not working for a couple months and I’m taking it as kind of a mindfulness journey.  My doctor told me I need to lower my stress and so I’m trying to figure that out.  I found a meditation coach- I’m doing a form of transcendental meditation where you meditate for 20 minutes.  So yeah, I’m doing it for a month, so let me know then if I seem calmer!

The Beatles were into transcendental meditation right?

Yes!  I just learned that they were the ones that brought transcendental meditation to the states.

Yeah, they went on that retreat to India in like ’67 or 68′.  Are you finding it difficult?

No!  The way my coach described it is that it is lazy person’s meditation.  I’ve always tried to meditate with different apps and nothing ever stuck because I can’t clear my mind.  In transcendental meditation, you don’t have to empty your mind, you just focus on your mantra and when your mind wanders you just acknowledge it and return to your mantra. So far my Whoop monitoring shows that my stress levels when I’m meditating are the same as when I’m sleeping.

Oh… Wow!  That is very cool.  That is the quiet part of your life and another one of Blair’s questions was how much physical activity you take on per day.  I’m assuming that has something to do with the fact that you’re known to take two classes in a day?

Yes!  I’m recovering from foot surgery, but when I’m not doing that a good week would look like: Fusion 6 mornings a week, Strength 3 evenings a week, swim practice twice a week, Peloton three times a week, and I just started adding yoga three times a week.

I have been seeing you showing up for yoga!  Plug for 6:15pm Thursday yoga at Hyde Park with Anna!

I was there last night- it was excellent!  I figured The Shop has these yoga classes with incredible coaches, why am I not taking advantage?

Very cool.  Yoga is kind of its own thing- I was curious if you could talk a little bit about the difference between Strength and Fusion class.

Oh my gosh, yes!  For me personally, being part of the 5am crew, Fusion is just as much social as it is a workout and a way to feel great as I start the day.  Being done with a hard workout with really fun wonderful people before the sun comes up every day just makes you feel good about yourself.  It is faster though and there is more cardio- I don’t always take the time the way I do in Strength.  I just started Strength last summer whereas I’ve been doing Fusion for I don’t know how long.  When I started doing Strength I started paying attention to the actual percentages and taking the time to not rush.  In March of last year I was deadlifting 55lbs and in November I hit 230lbs.  I feel stronger.  Some days it is hard to do two a days though.

Hard in terms of finding the time or finding the motivation?

Both!  But that crew at 5:30pm Manor Strength is so fun.  It is like I have this whole new group of friends.

Anyone you want to shout out there?  I’m not going to ask you to shout out the 5am people because I’ve interviewed you nut jobs before and you’re just going to call out everyone in that freaking class.  

*laughing* No, I’ll say the entire 5:30pm crew too- I don’t want to single anyone out.  I will say the person who got me into it was Marie (Hwang).  We used to work together and we still wanted to see one another, so she told me to start coming to Strength.  I started coming once a week, but the people were so great and I felt myself getting stronger, so it stuck.  It is fun being able to pick shit up!

It is!  When I first started pushing my weights, the first cool thing was when I realized I was deadlifting an NFL offensive lineman-

Yes!

I just deadlifted Nate Newton!  Do you have any similar comparisons?

I don’t, but now I’ll need to!  Like can I deadlift my husband?

Right?  You two don’t really work out together ever- is that just because he isn’t a 5am kind of guy?

He’s not a 5am person and whereas half of me being here is social, he is just really focused on his workout so he is more of a solitary person.  

I think that is very much a testosterone thing.  I’m a super social person, but when I’m at the gym with my wife I have a strict “no touching me” policy… that she violates pretty often.  That’s okay though.  So you love both the 5am class and the 5:30pm class, but aside from one being Fusion and the other being Strength, is there another difference between those communities?

It feels like 5am is a little more type A.  Super focused and on to the next thing.  Then 5:30pm is a little more relaxed- it is just a nice way to end the day.

That tracks.  So far this interview has been this tour of healthful decisions you make in your life- fitness, meditation, more fitness- what do you do for fun?  What indulgences?

Umm… I come to Dane’s for fun.  When you come somewhere for two hours a day, it is a good chunk of your day.  If you’ve been in Hyde Park, you’ve seen me walking my three dogs-

Yes!  Their names are?

Brandy Alexander (like the cocktail), Bubba Newton, and Benny G.

Brandy is the only one that comes around here right?

Brandy is the only one that comes here because she is the only I’m not afraid of peeing on the turf.  The boy dogs, I don’t trust them so they stay at home-

Public service announcement- please don’t let your dogs pee on the turf, people do sit ups there for crying out loud!  Now Brandy is deaf right?

Yeah, they are all boxers.  Interesting fact, most white boxers are deaf.  

I had no idea.  Now I know that Graham is a big concert person, are you?

Yeah, we both are.  I really wasn’t until I met him, but then he is really good at finding music I would like.  He worked at an independent record store up in New York for a long time.

That tracks because even though he isn’t a super chatty person he is a good person to have a conversation with because he knows cool shit.

Oh yes!  And he is the best person to add to your trivia team.

Do you have a favorite concert you’ve been to recently?

For my birthday we went to Margo Price.  That was really fun.  We go to the movies a lot- we’re going to see Dazed and Confused next weekend at Alamo.

Alright, Alright, Alright!

Yes!  I’m trying to read more books-

Anything currently?

Actually, right now I’m reading Alright, Alright, Alright: The Oral History of Dazed and Confused.

That’s fun!  You’ll be primed for the film.  Well, we have a particularly robust random question section with most of the coach sourced questions there.  Another one from Autumn- you always have fun hair, do you have a favorite hair coloring scheme 

you’ve received?

I have the world’s best colorist and I usually give her an inspirational photo.  The last one I gave her was a nineties magic eye poster.  I think my favorite was when I gave  her a photo of an opal.

I think I can picture what that one was- pretty recent right?

Yes!  It was different colors in the light.  I think my next one might be the Northern Lights.

Oooo Aurora Hairialis!  

*laughing* Yes!

Magic Eye posters- were you ever able to see the image?

Oh yes, you really have to focus.

Yeah, I could never get it and I was so frustrated.  To this day the idea of them makes my blood pressure rise.  Okay, Stormie wanted to know if you know exactly how many shoes you own?

*big laughter* Stormie and I like to talk about Nikes.  I keep suggesting Nikes for her to wear on her wedding day and I really love the ones she picked.  I don’t know how many I have, but I am figuring out how to store them which probably means I have too many.  

I’m not a shoe guy at all, I don’t understand where the love of them comes from.

I think it is because you can wear a pretty basic outfit with a pop of color on a really cool pair of kicks.  Now that I’ve had ankle/foot surgery, I’ve had to get rid of my heels, so I’m going really in on sneakers that make statements.  

Lauren wanted to hear about your time as a Jazzercise instructor?

*Roaring laughter* It wasn’t technically Jazzercise, it was just aerobics.  In college and after college, I was a certified aerobics instructor.  I taught step aerobics at UNH- big classes of 50 people or so- I loved it so much that I considered not getting a job with my major and instead going to club med to become an aerobics instructor.

What a different path that would have been.

I loved it and have wondered if there would ever be a world in which we’d have step aerobics at Dane’s.

If that world comes, I think we know who our first interview will be!  Lauren also wanted to know about churning?  I have no clue what she is talking about here.

Uhhh….  *mildly blushing* I don’t know if we should talk about that one…

*Laughing* Okay, I’ll hit you up on that once we’re off the record!  Now one from yours truly- you strike me as maybe a karaoke person-

Um…. I’m only good at karaoke when I’m pretty drunk.

Do you have a favorite song you’ve done?

“Bust a Move” by Young MC.  I look at who is in the room and then google the most popular karaoke song so they can sing louder than me because my voice is horrible.  I have a terrible voice.  It is so bad that I have a clear memory of being in 3rd grade belting it out and Ms. Courtney went line by line to figure out who was making the noise and told me to be quiet.

That is traumatizing!  Maybe your meditation will help you to heal that wound.  It kind of makes me want to ask you to sing right now-

No!!!  You can ask Graham, it isn’t pretty- Ms. Courtney was right.

That brings me to my next question: do you have a secret talent?

I’m really good at optimizing things- organizing and finding the most efficient path.  

My wife and I recently moved into a house and are still nesting and such, so my follow up question there would be do you have anything around the house that you are particularly proud of optimizing?

Yes!  Our backyard.  When we first moved in, it was a giant mud puddle.  My dream is to turn our backyard into a luxury hotel situation.  We’ve got our pool and firepit and the goal is to make it feel like every day is a vacation so when you actually go on vacation, you go on an adventure.

Do you have a surprising pet peeve?

Um… I hate it when people jog in place at stop lights.  I don’t know why.

That is a good one!

Yeah, no clue.  It is just like, “What are you doing?  Just stand still.”

That is so funny, I’m trying to figure out if I’m a run at stop lights person.  I think maybe in my twenties I was but now I just take it as divine intervention that I should rest for a second.  That is exactly the kind of answer that I’m looking for when I ask this question.

It is so judgemental and stupid.

It is!  That is why it is perfect.  Well that is most of the questions I have.  Do you have any words of wisdom you’d like to conclude with?  You’ve given a lot of wisdom already, so you could go a whole other direction and just leave me with fighting words.

*laughing* Rather than words of wisdom, I’ll just say thank you to the Dane’s Community.  I’m sure you’ve had people talk about this, but being able to come here during the pandemic saved me.  I was in my house all day long, working crazy hours at HEB trying to figure out how to get people groceries and being able to first work out at home on Zoom and then to have a place to workout outside saved my sanity.  Those outdoor workouts in the park?  We’d been coming to The Shop for a couple years already, but that is what really made me think how special this community is.  

It cuts both ways.  I would hear about the emotional toll the pandemic was taking on people and I kept thinking that I felt okay.  I realized it was because I have this job where it is my job to spend time around people like you.  So thank you for showing up during those tough times.

My pleasure!

Well Leslie, this has been great.  This is for Brandy, this is for Bubba, this is for-

Benny!

And for Graham.

All of us on Avenue F!  

Avenue F folks- go find her and learn about “churning”!

With professional photographic evidence of these two working out next to one another in class, I was fairly certain they’d be game for a two on one interview and would bounce off another nicely.  I wasn’t wrong!  We met on a Wednesday evening in May, just down the street from the Manor Road Shop at Batch for a refreshing beer and a wide ranging conversation.  Some things to look forward to?  Vanessa’s origin story as a legit-ass published author and Koes’s inspired road trip snack selections!

Coach Chad: So that was a photo of our (3 week old) daughter.  My wife is normally very helpful with these interviews when I text her and ask for some questions to throw out, but this time she just sent this photo and said “ask them if they agree that this is the cutest baby in the world”.

Vanessa King: Right Now? Absolutely!

But, with you both being parents, I suspect there might not be universal agreement if we were talking cutest baby ever.

VK: But that wasn’t the question!

Alright then, Hero wins it!  Lovely.  Well, I sent you both a prompt to start off with and throw some chaos into this by having a question I don’t even know what is to come.  Vanessa, did you come up with a question for Koes?

VK:  Yeah!  Mine is pretty basic- what brings you into the gym?  Not just at Dane’s, but your fitness journey. 

Koes Bong:  My fitness journey?  Ah…  I was never really into gyms.  Mostly because it felt too expensive.  I know I talk about hating running, but I used to run a lot.

VK:  That’s why you hate it!

KB: Uh huh!  At one point I thought I would train for a half marathon.  One day I hit 6.5 miles and I thought to myself “I’m done!  This was a long time to run”- so I stopped running. This was in Portland and one of my kid’s friends’ parents runs a Crossfit gym and they offered two free sessions.  So I went and loved it and that is how I started doing Crossfit for a while.  Then the pandemic happened, we moved to Austin and- how I found Dane’s was kind of funny.  I needed an oil change, so I looked up oil change and- 

Yes! We got one!

VK: *Laughing knowingly

KB:  And somehow Dane’s Body Shop showed up.  I figured this is great, I’ll just drive down the street and get it changed. I showed up and it was a gym!  So I ended up taking a tour and didn’t sign up right away.  I remember exactly when I decided to join though.  I was at the Blue Hole in Wimberly and went to do one of the rope swings and wasn’t strong enough-

VK:  Oh no!

KB:  So that is when I decided to go to the gym.

No better motivator than not being able to properly enjoy water time in the Texas Summer.  That is a really cool story!  And did you have a question to fire back at Vanessa?

KB: I would love to hear more about your journey of becoming an author.

VK:  Oh gosh!  Which part?

KB: Like, did you just get up one day and say “I’m going to start writing”?

VK:  Here we go!  I’ve always loved reading and I have a lit degree, so I’ve always loved writing about what I read.  I was working as a glorified receptionist (which is a line in my book!) at a department of defense contractor in Colorado Springs so I had top secret clearance as well.  I would just write about jobs I had in the past that were more fun-

Such as?

VK: I spent a lot of time as a life guard.  I was a life guard at an air force base which was really fun as a 17 year old putting full grown men in time out.  Years later after we moved to New York I got a course for the Gotham Writers Project from my mother in-law for Christmas.  I signed up for the novel writing course and just started going.  About eight of us continued meeting after the eight week course for the three years I spent living in New York.  The next move was Arkansas and there isn’t a lot to do in Arkansas when you have a two month old, so I just wrote to fill time and find my happy place.  In Seattle I put together another writer’s group and that is when I got a manuscript together and started querying agents.  I got some requests and some revisions and some passes.  Then we were in Colorado and years had passed. While I was waiting to hear back for one project a friend told me they were working on a retelling of The Wizard of Oz set at a music festival.  I was immediately like “I love you, but shut up- I have an idea.  A retelling- boom!”  Burlesque stuff, I loved doing that in New York and I love “Pride & Prejudice”- that’s what is happening.  It took about 18 months for me to write it out and start submitting; I got 69 rejections- nice!- but I got two offers of representation!  We had a couple months of revising and then the same evening I got the email from (her daughter) True’s school that Covid was closing it down, I emailed the final draft to my agent.  She submitted it Monday and by Wednesday we had an offer!

KB:  Wow!

And the name of the book Vanessa?  Where can we find it?  Plug it!

VK:  “A Certain Appeal” and you can find it where books are sold!

“A Certain Appeal” Alright!  Great questions.  There is actually photographic evidence of you two working out together in class.  How often do you end up in the same class?

VK: Not super often.  but I see you in passing because you take the 9am Strength and I will take the 10am.

KB:  Yeah, I do the 9am because Lindsey (his wife) has her workout at 10, so I can walk home and the kids are only alone for like 15 minutes.

And by kids, you mean your 2 month old twins right?

KB: Yes, exactly.  No, they are almost 13 years old and 11.

VK: Shoot, I was babysitting at that age!

Before we get too far into specifics, Koes can you give me your life in a bite size nugget since we got a bit of Vanessa’s back story?  Give me your story in a pecan shell.

KB: I was born in Indonesia- my home town is in west Borneo.  When I was 13 I left home and went to a boarding school, an international school.  I had teachers from Tulsa Oklahoma there and then when they moved back they offered for me to come to Tulsa if I wanted to go to college there.  So my first place in the U.S. was Tulsa; I can still vividly remember what I first saw in August in Tulsa- completely brown and flat.  I was there for eight years- it is where I met my wife Lindsey.  Two weeks after I met her, I moved to Portland Oregon, 6 months later she moved to Portland, and then two months after that I lost my job and so I had 30 days to get my job or I’d have to move back to Indonesia.  Lindsey, brilliant as she is, suggested we just get married.  So we got married 28 days later and she gave me a green card-

VK: And her heart!

KB:  Yes!  With the promise that I’d be her sugar daddy.  To this day she’ll say that I’m not holding up my end of the bargain.  We were in Portland for 12 years and then we moved to Austin in August of 2020 for more sun.

VK:  Yes!  That is why we left Seattle!  That and the food.

Riffing off that, can you both rattle off a few of your favorite foods in Austin?

VK:  I do tell people that at Bird Bird Biscuit, The Firebird alone is enough of a reason to come to Austin.

KB:  Yes!  Agreed!

VK:  Uchiko happy hour- the only happy hour that matters.  It is severely discounted!  I’ve had Air BnB guests come just for that happy hour.

Wow.  And you Koes?

KB:  Tacos are my favorite: Vera Cruz, Cuantos tacos, and the one I’ve been wanting to try is Nixta.  Also Uchi- I love them.  Birdies is at 12th and MLKish- very unassuming tiny sign, but it is really great.  And the most fun one we’ve recently experienced is Tiki Tatsuya.  I’ve got to say, I miss Portland food even more than Austin.

VK:  Yes! 

Really?  Well, more hipsters so I guess that tracks.

VK:  Yeah and there is less to do outside so you have to have good food.

Chicago is that way too- my Chicago food bucket list before we moved was enormous.  Something I also wanted to ask you was the differences you perceive in Strength versus Fusion classes.

VK:  It is more of a grab bag with Fusion because you’re going to get the weightlifting, but you’re also going to get the EMOM or AMRAP conditioning thing.  For Strength, I do like the more concentrated approach.

KB:  I feel the same.  I used to strictly do Strength and I’ve switched to doing Fusion also because I needed the cardio and that has been great.  Strength feels more “zen” since you’re taking your time and moving at your own pace.

VK:  Yeah, I like how much you have to focus in Strength.  Fusion is a caper!

KB:  Yeah and I feel like you see people struggling more in Fusion.

Any observations on the differences between the different coaches?  Like music choices or quieter versus louder?

VK:  I can’t say that anyone is particularly quiet.  In terms of music, you’ll get more eighties stuff with Beth (Reyburn).  Lauren’s music is a total grab bag.  And your music is a grab bag too, but like a distinctly Chad grab bag- like only in your class will we get The Darkness.

Well I’m happy to have the market cornered on early 2000’s falsetto glam rockl!

KB:  And I’ll say that a theme I see in all of the coaches is pushing us to get stronger, but telling us to listen to our body.  If you can’t do something it is okay- you’re no less a human for not being able to do a certain thing on a day.  You’re all so kind and encouraging.

Awwww….

KB:  Always looking out for form- form first!

VK: Yep!

You guys obviously both have families and a rich life outside of fitness- you’re both very well-rounded individuals.  How does what you do inside the gym translate to your life outside of it?

KB:  I can swing properly now at Blue Hole!

VK:  You model functional fitness!

That’s great, we’ve helped you achieve what you wanted to be able to do.  You’ve graduated now!

KB:  Yeah, now I can cancel my membership!  Overall though, just feeling healthier and stronger.  It is a great stress relief.  

VK:  I love being a physically strong figure for my daughter.  We have very different body types- she has her dad’s lengthy spider monkey body and I have shorter levers, so I can do things like push-ups, but she’ll be able to reach things for me!  I like being visibly strong- I get hollered at when I’m at Schlitterbahn *adopts thick rural Texas accent* “Hey!  You got strong lookin arms!”.

New Braunfels thirst trap over here!  You’re both people who interact with other folks when working out- do you have a particular approach or type of person you find yourself interacting with?

VK:  I like jumping into conversations if I overhear something I am familiar with.  I’m a human, it is fun to talk to other humans.  Apparently I initially had a reputation as a “serious person” with the 5am crew- I mean I do workout seriously, but I can chat!

KB:  Going to the same class day and time, what I like is seeing similar people showing up every time.  Eventually you just end up saying hi!  With Covid, I think we lost sense of how to make friends stressing out with whether people will say hi back.  Recently I have really enjoyed working out with Eric Lepine-

Badass dude from New England!

KB:  He pushes me because he works so hard.  I just try to follow him- it is an inspiration.

VK:  It is having a rabbit.

KB:  And he’s a big soccer fan- even though I don’t like the team he supports; *darkly* he supports Liverpool and I support Manchester United.

Ohhhhh… And when you say he pushes you, does he say anything?

KB:  He doesn’t need to!  Just trying to follow him.

That’s good!  I like to tell people that we don’t encourage explicit competition at The Shop, but noticing that someone else is putting the work in and being inspired to do the same at your own level is really great.  I love that.  A couple random questions.  If there were a movie of your life, who would play you?  what genre would it be?  and who might direct it?  Any or all of those questions.

KB:  Pedro Pascal!  Just kidding-

Why not?!?

KB:  Maybe Steven Yeun.

He’s pretty great.  I think he’d have to get a little more jacked to play you though.

VK:  I think he’d be up for it- he’d enjoy the challenge.

KB: For genre, I don’t know.

VK: Maybe it could be about the unspoken rivalry between you and Eric  That’s what it could be called, “Unspoken Rivalry”!

KB:  There you go!  Pedro Pascal can play Eric.

I can see that- they both have great salt and pepper stubble beards.  Vanessa, you could answer this for yourself or for your book.

VK:  I’d love that.  The movie version of my book would obviously be a rom com as is Pride & Prejudice.  I had some Bookstagrammers come up with fantasy casting and I was like, “Oh you’re all so young, I don’t know any of these people!”.  

Alright!  What is your favorite swear word?

KB:  Motherfucker.

VK:  That’s good!  We say dickhead a lot- that was my grandmother’s go to.

KB: I say fuck a lot at the gym- like FUCK that was hard.

VK:  Like fuuuuuck!

Alright, so motherfucker and dickhead-

VK:  They fight crime!

Yes they do!  Okay, so I’m reimagining the idea of a “guilty pleasure” because it presupposes that reasonable people should always want to eat something healthy.  So instead I want guilty pleasure to be something you are truly embarrassed by.  For instance, and I only do this on road trips, but I fucking love Combos.

VK:  Yes! 

KB: *Shaking his head confused*

It’s like a cracker wrapped around a pizza or cheese filling-

VK:  But it’s like a gritty cheese!  It totally looks like a dog treat.

Exactly!  What is yours Vanessa?

VK:  Oh, it is sweet tart ropes!  There should be some shame to that- it is a rainbow and there is the chewy crap outside and this white paste in the middle.  You’ve got to get the rainbow flavored one.  

KB:  Inspired by your answer Chad, mine is also during a road trip.  I always have beef jerky, the spicy Cheetos, and root beer.  I don’t drink soda, but on a road trip I always have root beer.

VK:  What an unholy trifecta.  The trinity of the dads.

Follow up question there- the taste of Cheetos is great, but I can’t stand having the cheese powder on my fingers-

KB:  Oh that is the best, just licking my fingers.

VK:  I taught at a high school for a year and the kids would cut open the bag of flaming hot Cheetos, pour in nacho cheese, and eat it with a fork.

On to the opposite of pleasure, what is your pettiest pet peeve?

KB:  There is a right way and a wrong way of loading a dishwasher.

*nodding vigorously* my mother in-law was in town this week and I know what you speak of my brother!  Loading that shit from the front?  How are you going to load the back?

KB:  Plates go in one direction, bowls on top- space efficiency and it makes it so much easier when you unload them!  Lindsey will troll me once in a while and will intentionally load it wrong, I’ll have to redo the dishes and she’ll just sit there laughing.

That is the most fascinating S&M relationship I’ve heard of.  Incredible!

VK:  I’m very petty just as a person- I don’t know where I’d even start. Name a subject and I’ll have an opinion of something that bugs me.  Kiddos not behaving in a restaurant!  I get not having a lot of exposure during Covid, but you don’t get to just run around tables- have some awareness of the people around you.  Parents, tell your child where the boundaries are!

What is an unexpected talent that you have?  Something people who see you regularly wouldn’t guess?

VK: I have a stupid human trick.  I can wiggle my nose up and down- not like Bewitched, because that was side to side, but up and down *proceeds to bring all kinds of bunny rabbit realness!*

KB: I speak 5 languages-

Yes!  I figured that coming from Indonesia, you spoke at least two, but I would have put the over/under at 3.

KB:  Indonesian, English, and then three different Chinese dialects.

Awesome- so all you fuckers on duo lingo, step off!  I’ve got you both beat, I have the smallest nipples of any man alive.

KB:  For everyone reading, Chad just slowly unbuttoned his shirt and showed us!

Well lets wrap up with some final thoughts here.  We have a chat and put your name up on the board, but people are legitimately excited to hear what you say.  I think you’ve both spoken words of wisdom already, but if you have any final thoughts to share with the community, you are now members of the “pantheon” of Shop athletes.  Any parting words?

VK:  A phrase that was tossed around at a gym I went to in the past was “it is a privilege to be able to choose your form of suffering”.  While “suffering” is a little extreme, I like the idea.  Speaking for myself, my life is pretty comfortable and so a little bit of discomfort is necessary to make progress in the world.  If you’re fortunate enough to have to seek that out for yourself, then do it!

That is actually something I will tell people- if something feels painful then stop doing it, but discomfort is kind of why we workout.  Pain is bad, but discomfort is what we’re looking for.

VK: There was a coach that was known for not paying attention to the clock and we would always cry out “when are we done?!?!?” and he would say “You’re done when you’re proud!”.

I like that!  And you Koes?

KB:  How do I even follow that?  I think that comparison is the thief of joy.  So don’t compare yourself to others or maybe even your past self.  We all have good days and bad gym days.  I saw a social post the other day about how if one day, giving it your 40% is the most you can do for that day, then 40% is your 100%.  So listen to your body.  Find support and connection from all the wonderful athletes and coaches at The Shop!

Well that is just spectacular.  Thank you both for coming out- this was a lovely conversation!

Do you want to know what my greatest fear is?  The thing that keeps me from falling asleep altogether most nights and, on the nights where I am granted a few moments of repose, yanks me at once out of my slumber in a cold sweat screaming like a banshee?  That bottomless well of terror which is my constant companion is the prospect of my recording device glitching during a Shop Athlete Spotlight interview.  On a balmy July afternoon, my great terror came to pass.

The couple drinks I had with Savanna and Doak were pleasant and refreshing, but not so fine a tonic as the conversation.  These two staples of the 6am Strength class at Hyde Park had a beautiful rapport and played off one another marvelously.  The loss of the full transcript is a tragedy on par with the burning of the library of Alexandria by that upstart tyrant Julius Caesar, but Doak and Savanna were game enough to recreate some of the finer points by answering some of the very questions I asked a few months later.

The spirit of the original interview is very much captured in the way Doak’s thoughtfulness and earnest approach to the conversation conterpoised with Savanna’s madcap irreverence.  I’ll pop in and out with this lovely little italic narrative voice to offer some context and commentary.

(Coach Chad will be in bold letters) How did you two meet?  I decided to start the interview with questions you might expect directed toward a romantic couple.  Doak & Savanna clearly have a strong bond, but it isn’t a romantic one.  In fact, both of their significant others get referenced in the answers to my questions!

Doak: We met at the gym.  I believe my wife, Scarlett met her first at the noon class, but then she started coming to 6am strength classes and that’s when I met her.

Savanna: I met him at a Social Fusion about a year ago. He was playing cornhole with a bunch of guys that were all tall and exceptionally skilled at cornhole. I remember feeling jealous at their expertise and figured I had to hatch a plan to topple this Tall Men Who Are Good at Cornhole regime.  

Aha!  Our first example of the passing of time changing perception.  Slightly different ideas of when they met, but the important thing is that these crazy kids did meet!

What was your first impression of one another?

Doak: She seemed very friendly, always smiling and happy with a sarcastic humor that I appreciate.

Savanna: My first impression of Doak was, how dare he be so good at lawn games? Who gave him the right? He seemed like a nice enough guy, but there was something sinister going on… I felt I had to investigate more. Over the years, I have come to find out there is an entire secret group of Tall Men Who Are Good at Cornhole at Dane’s Body Shop. They look like anyone else, but don’t be fooled.

The cornspiracy begins…

What do you think the other one’s most winning quality is?

Doak: I’d probably say positivity and humor.

Savanna: Doak is pretty consistent with coming to 6am strength class. He always uses the same squat rack, which really puts a lot of people at ease: to know there is one consistent thing we can all count on in a world of chaos! Also, Doak has a good sense of humor and he always finishes class on time, something I have never been able to do since (strength coach) Keith is always talking my ear off about his collections of antique furniture and stamps.

What is the one question you want to ask the other person but have always been afraid to ask?

Doak: I forgot what I said on this one during our live interview and not that I was afraid to ask her, but I think I said something about why did you move to Austin or how long have you and Zach been dating?

Savanna: Well, recently he let Tim Zeddies steal my squat rack. I have never been able to understand how Doak could allow such a crime to happen right under his nose. So, my question is… how dare you? I have my suspicions that Tim is part of this Tall Men Who Are Good at Cornhole group.  

How did you find Dane’s Body Shop?  A pivot to more typical and (self promotional) interview questions.

Doak: Through Scarlett.

Savanna: Instead of leaving me money when I lost my baby teeth, the Tooth Fairy gave me the address of Dane’s Body Shop and said, “What you find here will be worth more than any amount of money I could ever give you.” When I saw Jose Luis’ photo in the bathroom, I knew she was right.

At this point in the interview, as I recall, Doak was sipping a margarita, I had a cool beer, and Savanna was furiously slurping down a stein glass filled with ayahuasca.

Give me a brief rundown of what life outside of The Shop is like for you?

Savanna: When not dreaming of the fall of capitalism, I like to ride my bike, read books, and drink many cups of coffee. 

Doak: Outside of the shop I’m involved in the real estate world as an agent, investor and developer.  Scarlett and I are frequently in Rockport where we are working on a few airbnb’s and building a house.  I’m also an avid golfer and Texas Longhorns fan, Hook’em!

What sort of goals are you currently or generally working toward?

Savanna: I recently learned about bioregionalism, which has led me to be more curious about what flora is around me at any given time. I learned in Rockport there is a plant called “sea grapes”, which “serve as a dune stabilizer and protective habitat for small animals. Tall sea grape plants behind beaches help prevent sea turtles from being distracted by lights from nearby buildings” (according to Wikipedia). Generally, I’d like to have a better knowledge of the natural world around me. 

Doak: Generally just working toward staying fit/getting stronger, but would like to complete one of Jesse Itzler’s “29029” events in which you climb the equivalent of Mt. Everest (29029 ft) in 36 hours – https://29029everesting.com/

In spite of their differences, they are both highly driven individuals!

Do you favor a more fixed or variable workout schedule?

Savanna: I prefer a fixed workout schedule. I notice I do best when I start the day with a morning workout. 

Doak: I am a pretty dedicated 6am’er, but like the flexibility of having options of classes at other times.

Doak, Do you know the name of all of your ducks? Coach Lauren sent me a few questions that she was curious about.  This one and the next three are all her!

Doak: No, I only knew a few of their names, but Scarlett knew all of them as well as their middle names.  The ducks now reside in Lockhart, TX at Scarlett’s niece’s house that is on 4 acres.

Savanna, explain, for us, your connection to “jorts”?

Savanna: It’s one of my favorite portmanteaus. Also, the word jorts sounds funny. 

Doak, Would you let us have a coach’s retreat at your property in Rockport? 

Doak: Of course!  I don’t know why but I clearly remember this answer during the interview- glad it hasn’t changed because we’re totes taking you up on it buddy.  Bluff called!

Both of you- who is your favorite Shop Ginger? 

Savanna: Keith, obviously. Does the sun rise in the east? The other thing I remember about the actual interviewis that this insolent little trollop used this question to personally roast me with a calculated sadism not seen since the movie “Saw”.

Doak: They are all great!  No Doak, you’re great!

If you were to describe yourself as a fruit or vegetable, which would it be and why?  Now we do that thing where I ask a bunch of super silly questions so we really get to see what our SAS! Recipients are made of.

Savanna: I couldn’t help but wonder… if someone were to ask me if I would describe myself as a fruit or vegetable, what would I say? 

Doak: Not sure what I said for this during the live interview, but I’d probably say a potato. I consider myself to be a pretty humble, down-to-earth person and a potato is a root vegetable, growing down below the earth.  Another reason is universality, potatoes seem to play a major role in almost every major cuisine. Similarly, I can be a key contributor to any group, project or circumstance in which I find myself.

If you had an entrance song that played every time you entered a space, what would it be?

Savanna: Whichever song Tim Zeddies hates the most. 

Doak: I think I said Simply the Best by Tina Turner, but I could put several AC/DC songs in there as well.  Another great actual answer Doak- with respect to this particular interview, you really are simply the best!

Would you rather fight one horse-sized duck or 50 duck sized horses?

Savanna: Probably… one horse-sized duck. 

Doak: I’d probably say 50 duck sized horses since horses generally seem to be less aggressive than ducks can be.

If a movie was made of your life, what genre would it be?  Who would play you?  Who would direct it?

Savanna: I hope the genre would be picaresque and a chihuahua would play me. In the movie version of my life, there would be a lot more troublemaking and a high-speed chase in the Southwest. Maybe there would be a buffet and the biggest jorts-heist the world has seen.  Holy crap, that is technically an actual answer!  I feel like Will Ferrell’s Alex Trebek from the 90’s SNL Jeopardy! sketches.

Doak: I’d get Chris Pratt or John Krasinski to play me and probably Todd Phillips or Richard Linklater to direct it.  For genre I’d say action, sports or military.

Now that you’ve joined the pantheon of Athletes of the season, do you have any words of advice for your adoring public?

Savanna: Get to 6am strength early or Tim Zeddies will steal your squat rack!!!! 

Doak: Be consistent and show up.  There are days we all wake up not wanting to go to the gym, but I’ve never heard anyone say after a workout that they weren’t glad they showed up.  As the Navy Seals say, “The only easy day was yesterday!”  Way to stick the landing for us Doak!

I met Anna Grimes (née Reynal) at Hank’s in Windsor Park for a happy hour libation and a truly sparkling Shop Athlete Spotlight interview.  The frozen Paloma was refreshing, but the real tonic was Anna’s frank and thoughtful assessment of and appreciation for creativity. Our conversation ranged from her role as a photographer of our community to the unbridled sexiness of her dog Oso! 

Coach Chad: Let’s get this going!  So the way that I wanted to frame this conversation is: you’re now our community photographer!  Have you been enjoying it?  Has it changed your perspective on the community?

Anna Grimes:  Yes, it is really fun and I think it made me feel like even more a part of the community.  I’ve got to meet a lot of people I wouldn’t otherwise meet, because I have a very specific cluster of classes that I attend, so I get to meet people from other time zones-

Time zones?  Like Shop Standard Time, Shop Mountain Time?

*Laughing* No, like morning zone, afternoon zone.  You know!  I’ve got to meet a lot of the different coaches too.  It has just been really fun.  I enjoy it!

Have you learned anything about the difference in tone for the various classes?

I mean, I learned that even before I started photographing classes.  Every coach has a different flavor.

Which coaches do you typically have in your specific cluster of classes you attend?

Mostly Keith, some Dane, and a little bit of Bean.

Can you talk about the difference in the flavors of different coaches?

*laughing* I need you to note that I’m shaking my head right now!  Well, Dane and Keith know that I like to instigate between the two of them.

Oh!  And how do you instigate?

I just like to repeat the things that they say about each other the next time I see them.

Can you give an example of something Keith has said about Dane or Dane has said about Keith?

Wow!  I love that we’re just jumping in with this!

I told you that this conversation could go in any direction.

*laughing* I don’t know where it started, but the most recent thing was I told Keith that Dane thinks that he is smart and good at his job.

Oh!  So it was something nice you shared?

Yeah, because I thought I had gone a little too far in pitting them against each other.  And they are both so great.  You coach Strength, so you know Keith has a very specific way of doing things and sometimes when Dane subs for Keith he doesn’t completely agree with how Keith wants things done.  So I think it started when Dane gave me a note on my power clean and I told him it was different from what Keith said.

Well that is fine, because there is more than one way to skin a barbell!

Always!

Circling back to photography, when I prepared for my interview with (SAS nom from last year) Natalie Cincotta, I looked up her instagram page and she just had really dynamic and thoughtful photos.  So I asked her what draws her eye; what draws your eye Anna?

For personal photography, the thing that catches my eye most is going to be color.  I love to photograph movement, so doing photography at a gym is awesome for that.  Double exposures- I like to take things that seem like they might not belong together and smoosh them together.

That is super cool!  You’ve worked as a wedding photographer and a real estate photographer, is that correct?

Yes, I did weddings for 8 years and then we moved to Austin and I was burned out so I quit weddings and then the pandemic hit-

Oh yeah, that thing-

Yeah, yeah, that little thing.  It was kind of a forced detour.  My plan had been to work on building up a print shop; to take my personal work and put it in a place where people could purchase them to add colorful art to their house.  But the pandemic sidelined that because travel is an important part of my personal work.  So I picked up working at a company that did real estate photos and that was very boring.

So, aside from photography at The Shop, what is your outlet now?

I really miss working with other people, so I’m working on doing photography for other business owners, particularly individuals who are creatives.  I don’t know if Dane would call himself a creative, but I see a really creative spirit in the way that The Shop does things.  Particularly the mini-meets- you can’t tell me that Brains & Brawn isn’t a creative outlet.

He would probably humbly demure and say that he isn’t a creative, but he is.

Absolutely!  I use that word to describe anyone who has a creative spirit inside of them.  It doesn’t mean that you are a painter or you are a writer- those are great things- but I think there are plenty of other people who the label of “creative” fits.

That is actually a great transition because I also wanted to ask you about writing- I know you do that also.  Can you talk a little bit about that or talk about your larger artistic vision- what drives you?

That’s a fun question because I’m still ironing that out.  What drives me right now is figuring out how to allow myself and the people that I work with to feel free in whatever I’m working with them in or whatever I’m creating for them.  My writing right now is mostly journaling- writing about what my artistic vision for myself is and how to help others create.

That is really interesting.  Dane recently leant me a book on writing, Bird by Bird, and one of the themes it keeps returning to is the idea of creativity coming from sort of unclogging the pipes.

Yeah!  I think that is true.  Doing weddings, for example, my goal was to help people not feel boxed in by their time lines or that they have to do things a certain way because that is how it has always been done.  I want people to be able to do things the way they want to do them and also to have whatever I create for them to be an expression of who they are.  I think that applies to photographing The Shop too.  There is a desire in creative people to make something that feels like them, but when I’m working with someone I want to be able to create something that feels like an expression of that person or that thing.

So kind of creating a canvas for them to put themselves onto?  That is really cool.  I always like to get a little bit of background information in these conversations, so I was wondering if you could talk a little be about where you come from, but keep it through the lens of your artistry as well.

I grew up in Maryland. So… *laughs nervously* hmm.  I probably shouldn’t let my mom read this.  I grew up in a very religious environment and I thought that was what I wanted for myself because that is what my family wanted for me.  But I think part of why I got so burned out was I was spending so much time doing what other people wanted me to do and not following my own vision for myself- following rules that were set for me in that religious upbringing.  I think that is a huge part of how I grew up and then who I became is maybe a little bit of a reaction against that.

Were you already doing photography or writing when you went through that transition?

I was actually a musical kid- so I was in choir.  My major in college was music- ironically, my other major was leisure and sport management.  I wanted to be a wedding planner, which is how those two majors combined.  I’ve always enjoyed creating, but it wasn’t always photography.  The first thing I did with photography was when I was studying abroad in Italy I took a film photography class there and I think that set me on that path.  

Do you think that something about your art changed when you made the change to honoring your own path?

That is a really hard question to answer because it has been a lifelong progression for me.  I have a really strong autonomous streak and I think that actually shows up in the gym.  If I’m being told to push it in class, my upbringing means that my first reaction is that I need to push it, but that pulls me away from being able to listen to what is going on inside of myself and that is the thing I want to focus on.  So going to Italy was something that no one else wanted me to do- I’d never even traveled abroad.  This was also the time that I started to explore the world outside of my religious upbringing.  I didn’t connect the two at the time, but I think that trip and making that decision for myself made an impact.

Can you point to anything in that trip that influenced you as an artist?

Everything! How do you leave the culture that you grew up in and not be changed by that?  It completely changes the way you view the stories that you grew up with.

That is a great point.  It just gives you the power to challenge your assumptions I guess.  How did you end up in Austin?

That one is a boring story- my husband’s job.  We got here about a year and a half before the pandemic.

That is a good amount of time to get a feel for the city.  Prior to the pandemic, what did you gravitate towards?

I gravitated toward finding other people in creative communities- and not necessarily photography communities.  I wanted to play around with other creatives.  I think that creativity is very interesting *laughs* obviously! About six months before the pandemic a friend and I took a trip to Oaxaca and that was really cool- again getting to see a completely different culture.  They were celebrating Dia de los Muertos and noting the different way that that time of year is celebrated down there as compared to in the United States-

Ah, so you didn’t dress up like sexy bunnies?

*laughing* No we did not dress up like sexy bunnies!

Moving things towards talking about fitness, have you noticed anything about the interplay between fitness and creation?  For me, I do one longish run per week and I am always at my most creative after that.

That is what yoga was for me for the longest time.  The first time I photographed anything fitness related was at a yoga studio in Annapolis- that was before I even got my yoga teacher training.  There was something about photographing other people connecting to their bodies and then I did a trade with them so I took photos for them in exchange for classes.  So I took a lot of classes and I think that was my entry point into understanding that my body had a lot of things to tell me.  Yoga is more of a quiet form of fitness and I think there is a lot of benefit to that silence- to be able to hear what your body is trying to tell you.  I don’t think there is anything better or worse about yoga compared to cardio or strength training, but I do think that silence aspect was my way in to understanding that my body had a lot to say.

I like that observation!  Now that you mention it, I think it is a similar thing for me with running unclogging the pipes.

I think there is a lot of conventional thinking about meditation being silent and still.  Meditation doesn’t have to be completely still- I think you can be moving and also observing your thoughts with detachment which is the key to meditation.

That makes a lot of sense too.  As an actor, one of the tools for finding an authentic emotional space is using an activity to guide you into that state- not just telling yourself “I’m going to be sad now!”.  That is really interesting.  Please keep peppering in these sage observations.  I wanted to pivot to socializing.  One of the through lines with our Spotlight Athletes- and there are many reasons we nominated you-

Oh sure! *laughing* It’s because I’m the strongest person in the entire gym right?  *big laughter*

Oh yes!  You’re the strongest person and you’re also the hottest person-

Oh yes, lets keep going with the sarcastic reasons I got nominated!

People are saying that you are the smartest person at the gym, no one has ever been smarter than you, you and you alone are the most stable genius.  No, one of the through lines with the nominees is that they are often participants in or even in the center of the little sub-communities at The Shop-

Cliques?  Can we just call them cliques?

I feel like that word has such a pejorative connotation, but yeah cliques!  You’re in the doggie socializing clique.  Can you talk about how that happened?

Come on, who has a dog that hasn’t made a friend just because they have a dog.  Isn’t that the real reason to get a dog in the first place?

No, you got a dog because Oso is the sexiest dog in the world.  He is objectively perfect on an aesthetic level and I won’t hear otherwise!

*laughing* The actual reason was to be a guard dog.  My sister had sent me a picture of him and literally that night someone tried breaking into our house.  But he’s the worst guard dog ever!  We had a stranger in our back yard months later and Oso slept through the whole thing- he didn’t wake up until the cops showed up.

Well we know how he feels about the police then!  So you occasionally get together with other members who have dogs- who are some of your peeps?

Well, Oso picked Linus as his best friend, so Marc (long time member and resident stud muffin Sturdivant) and obviously you and your lovely wife and Bean.  Then there is this whole dog party so Janelle and Sara Abrams and Heather and I know I’m going to forget someone and I feel awful about that.

Who’s got the best dog other than Oso?

*Only half a beat of hesitation* Rimas.

Yeah.  Yeah, Islay is just awesome.  Who’s got the sexiest dog other than Oso?  As we’ve established, Oso is the sexiest dog- you’ve sent me so many sexy photos of him.

I think Whiskey is a pretty handsome dog (shouts to the good little boy who comes to class with Sierra!)

Yes Whiskey is a very good boy.  So you got a pool installed in your back yard over the pandemic.  Any pool plans with warm weather around the corner?

Um, open invitation to anyone who wants to use their big muscles to help me build my patio and then we can have a pool party afterward!

Alright- open invitation and I might take you up on that.  Just briefly, I wanted to ask how you ended up at Dane’s Body Shop?  How’d we get so lucky?

Google plus location!

Fair enough- what is your favorite style of workout?

Anything strength oriented which is not something I ever would have anticipated saying.

So that is a bit of an evolution for you as well?

Yes!  I definitely didn’t do a lot of weightlifting workouts before coming to The Shop.

Do you have a favorite lift?

The deadlift is definitely my thing.  It is the one that I don’t have to work as hard at to be good at- isn’t that everyone’s favorite though, the one they don’t have to work as hard at!

That’s true!  Okay, well I’m going to transition to some random questions.  The first one that I’m going to ask is: someone is making a movie of your life, who plays you? who directs the film? and what genre is the film.  You can answer any or all of those.

I’m going to come up with a way better answer for this when I leave!  I think it would be some sort of romantic comedy, but instead of me finding my perfect person it would be about finding my perfect way of creating.  Something like that.  Kind of a genre breaker in a way.  When I was a kid, someone told me I resembled Natalie Portman and who wouldn’t want Natalie Portman to play them.

I sure as hell would love her to play me!  Similar question, if you were a professional wrestler or in any situation where you needed entrance music, what would the entrance music be?

Something by Lizzo- probably “Juice”.  That is what Bean played for me during the Strong Person Mini Meet.  It’s my hype up music.

That’s great!  Which coach has the best music and which coach has the worst music?

Obviously Keith has the best music *Knowing look and a laugh*.  I don’t know who has the worst music, I’ve never been to a class where I can’t stand the music.  Since I was a music major, I can handle quite a variety of music listening experiences.

What is your favorite swear word?

Obviously fuck.  That is the one I was yelled at for saying as a kid.  Not even yelled at- mom was just like “I’m so disappointed in you”.  So now it is all I want to say!

And I all I want to DO!  Bahahaha!  I asked Grant (check out his interview as well) and his answer was “I try not to swear at all”.  I was like “come on man, that’s no fun!”.  If you were to fall into a toxic radioactive slurry, would you come out as a super hero or a super villain?

Hero.

Do you know what your power would be?

I’m pretty sure it would be something with fire or light- I don’t know what it would be exactly, but those are things I resonate with. I read a decent amount of fantasy, so I’ve actually thought about this question a lot.

Oh really?  What is your favorite fantasy story?

I’m currently reading the newest book by Sarah J. Maas.  She writes a lot of- well, they are sometimes called “sexy fairy stories”.

Ooohoo!  A little erotica?

There is a little in there.  They’re fun *giggling*.

I respect that, the woman I dated before Becca was quite the impressive amateur erotica writer.  It was fun.  

Did you help her research?

Naturally!  I’m a very collaborative person!  Okay, so you’re having a dinner party and you can pick 1-3 people currently living or throughout history to join you.  Who do you pick?

I actually had to write an essay about this to get into the honors program in college.  I’ve gone back and read that essay and it is unreadable!  The people I picked were so different than people I would pick now.  The person I’d want to have coffee with would be Taylor Swift.

That is a great answer.  Do you have a burning question you’d want to ask her?

I just want to know how she writes with such depth in her lyrics.  Lyrics are essentially poetry and anybody who writes poetry, I’m always amazed with the way they can convey so much emotion in so few words.  I can’t do that!  I’m such a wordy person.

I absolutely agree.  That economy of language is so impressive.  That is probably a good place to wrap things up.  So this is where I ask if you have any extra words of wisdom to impart.  I feel like you’ve been very wise throughout.  Think about newer members, maybe even members who haven’t joined yet.  They’re scrolling through the SAS! page on the website and they go “who is this Natalie Portman looking broad” and they click on your photo.

*laughing* My advice to myself is probably what I’d give to anyone else and that is “just show up”.  No matter how afraid you are or whatever your expectations are, just show up because that is all you can do.

It is remarkable how almost every Spotlight Athlete says that.  They are cliches for a reason.  I think that is because everyone has had that experience of something being hard and not being sure if they want to come back and then coming back a few times and realizing that it is hard and that is why you come back.

Yeah and I would say showing up is the way I’ve been able to connect with people- whether it is showing up to photograph a class or to participate in one, being there is the only way that I’m accomplishing my fitness goals yes, but also social goals on a daily basis.

Absolutely.  And I want to piggyback off of that; I kept my shit together relatively well during the pandemic and I think that was in large part because I had to be around other people because it was my job.  I had to coach, I had to see people every day.  Safe- masked when necessary and often outdoors, but I still had to be around people.  You took classes pretty much throughout right?

Yeah and that was a really hard decision at the beginning.  It felt like everyone on the internet mostly was saying that no one should go anywhere.  I feel like Dane’s handled the pandemic really really well.  I know it sucked for you guys to close down for those eight weeks or whatever, but you reopened when you were able and stayed open safely.  When the pandemic started, I felt like all of the relationships I had made in Austin started filtering away.  I understand why because everyone was trying to take care of themselves.  I don’t know that we would have stayed in Austin had I not had somewhere like Dane’s.

Well Anna- it is Anna right?

*laughs* Yes!  Two A’s and two N’s!

Fabulous talking to you.  Anna Grimes everybody!

Grant and I settled on a scenic hill overlooking the Moody Amphitheater in Waterloo Park downtown and enjoyed a couple hazy IPA’s and a warm conversation on a beautiful Sunday in February.  It wasn’t until the interview was almost over that I learned Grant’s incredible connection to that park!

Coach Chad: So you were doing our community workouts for a long time before becoming a member right?

Grant Dziuda:  Yeah, it was probably about a year.  A friend of mine, Renee, asked me to come with her and I really liked it, so I was a regular every Sunday community workout person.  

Yeah, I got to know you quite a bit before you ever even became a member.  Dane wanted to know if the only reason we got to have you as a regular member was because we stopped the community workouts when the pandemic hit.

No, no, I had joined before.  I joined January 1st right before the pandemic and signed up for 6 months at that point.

Was there something that convinced you to sign up for the regular membership?

I really liked (workout out at The Shop), but I had never paid that much for a membership.  I worked out at The Y for a long time and that is dirt cheap.  But I figured if I was coming 5-6 days a week, the price was worth it.

And you really do come 5-6 days a week?

Yeah!

And you work out at 5:30 or 6am right? I consider that to be a very clear manifestation of discipline- how do you maintain that discipline?  Any tricks to maintaining that regimen?

Not really- I’ve recently just realized that I’m naturally a very regimented and disciplined person.  It can actually be a little bit of a friction point with (his girlfriend) Kiani.  So I’ll sign up for all of my classes like a month out and cancel if I need to- it is just so rare that I cancel.

For those early morning classes, I’ll look at the roster the night before and try to figure out who is likely to sleep in and miss class and you’re one of those people that I never doubt is going to be there.  Now I don’t know a lot about your history, can you tell us just a bit about where you came from and where you grew up?

My parents both grew up in Detroit- both grandfathers worked in the auto industry, one for Ford and one for GM.  They had three kids in Detroit then they moved to St. Louis which is where I was born.

You’re like the midwestern version of a Kennedy!

Yeah I still follow all the St. Louis teams-

Did you follow the Rams to L.A.?  Were you jazzed about the Super Bowl?

Yeah, yeah, I understood why the would move.  Then we moved to the suburbs of Chicago.  I grew up the youngest of four kids- we’re all pretty close in age and we are still pretty close to one another.

I’m fascinated by birth order and how that effects how people turn out.  Do you feel like being the youngest affected you at all?  I feel like there were times when my little sister felt like she was chasing me, trying to live up to what I did.

Maybe when I was really young, but I know who I am and am happy with that- so I don’t feel the need to keep up with anyone else.  But going back to my parents, my dad hopped around to different sales time jobs and my mom worked as an aide in the local middle school- the same one I want to.  Yeah, she was at the same elementary school and then moved to the middle school when I did.  I had to cut her off from following me past that, “I know I’m your baby, but we’ve got to cut it off at some point!”.

Were they super disciplined?  Is that maybe where you got that trait from?

Not really.  I don’t know where that came from.  Maybe one place is that I played soccer my whole life and senior year I recognized that that part of my life was going to be over but I wanted to stay in shape, so I picked up track & field.  The coach we had for distance running was extremely disciplined; for that year he had a goal of running every single day- so like his “off” days would only be 3-4 miles.  If it would snow a foot during the day, he’d be out there shoveling the track so we could run.  So I think that might have had an impact on me.

How did that carry over to your time at (University of Wisconsin) Madison?

I just kept that same discipline.  I got recruited as a walk on for the rowing team, so that meant intense workouts every day.  Rowing on a rowing machine is very mentally draining.  

So soccer, track, rowing, and obviously what you do at The Shop- was there ever a period in which you weren’t athletically engaged?

Hmm… not really.  I should say that I studied abroad in Europe my Sophomore year in college-

And what were you studying again?

Civil Engineering.  I studied in Hungary and I looked into getting a membership, but I think it was just too expensive.  So for those 6 months I just didn’t really work out.  And it was drinking like five nights a week.  But you’re walking everywhere, so you’d think I’d come back with a beer belly but I actually came back weight less.  I probably had way less muscle though.  So yeah, without really even trying I was walking like 5-6 mile a day.

So beyond that illustration of the power of passive exercise, what else sticks with you about your time in Europe?  That is something I deeply regret- not doing a semester abroad.

The pace of life over there is so much slower.  Everything in the United States is just go, go, go. Over there the lifestyle is so much more relaxed.

Now earlier, you mentioned that Kiani is a little bit more laid back than you, do you think that is one of the things that attracted you to her- like reminding you of that slower pace to life?

It is less that she is laid back and more that she is a free spirit- more spontaneous than me.  I can be spontaneous and she draws that out of me.  Sometimes she’ll push me to do things that I don’t want to do initially and afterwards I have no clue why I didn’t want to do it.

Where did you two meet?

Oh we just met at a bar on the east side-

Wait?  People meeting in real life?  Not on an app?  This sounds insane.

*laughing*. Yeah we met in 2019.

One way of looking at the pandemic through the lens of relationships is that it separated the wheat from the chafe; that the couples who needed to break up, that is what finally pushed them to it and the couples that were strong got stronger.  You’re obviously in the second category right?

Yeah!  There were only brief stints of time where we were truly trapped at home together.  She is an ICU nurse, so there was no lapse where she had to stay home.  With my job, there was only a few weeks when I was home and that was before we moved in together.  So I guess to answer your question, it was different for us- we weren’t one of those couples who were locked in together for a long time.

Another question Dane had was when are we going to get Kiani at The Shop?

I don’t know- we’ve talked about it, but I think she just really likes the more cardio-based workouts.  I’ve done them with her also, but I just don’t like it as much as I like working out at The Shop.

Ooo!  This is a great opportunity for shameless self promotion.  What do you like most about working out at The Shop?

It may sound kind of strange, but I really like the yoga/stretching at the end of class because I never really stretched.  When I started learning new stretches, I’d feel better after the workout and I really liked that.  But also, I really like strength-based workouts- it gives me a goal and something to push myself toward.  I’m not trying to go to weightlifting competitions, it is just nice to have incremental progress.

That plays nicely into my next question.  Now that we’re moving from pandemic to endemic or whatever the case may be, one of the things that I’m loving seeing again is seeing people lifting together more.  Beyond using equipment in a more rational way, the socialization that happens when people lift together and the way they can give one another feedback and learn how to give feedback is really useful.  I’ve noticed you and Johnny Sullivan workout together quite a bit- can you talk about that experience a bit?  Maybe what you talk about between sets?  

We lift similar weights on a lot of lifts, so it is just easier to move between sets.  I always like to have someone spot me when we bench-

Yeah, it is always nice to not get crushed to death under a weight that is hovering over your chest.  So even beyond just Johnny, have you observed any benefits of working around him but also the group more broadly as opposed to a conventional gym?

Oh yeah!  That is one of the things I like most about Dane’s.  I think I just need to get out of the house to workout, so having a place where the workout is what I’m focused on.  Being told what to do for the workout is also really useful- just not having to think about what I’m going to do.

Oh absolutely!  I think I’ve mentioned it, but I religiously follow the Strength program because I want to have someone else’s programming to keep me honest.  I brought up Johnny, do you have any other folks you want to shout out?

I like my stock trading conversations with (coach) John and Doak (Embrey)-

John actually asked as one of his questions for you if you had any strategies for your stock portfolio that you’d like to offer?

*laughing* Oh, I don’t think I should be divulging that!  When I strike it rich, I’ll share the strategy.

Well that is fun!  Lets transition to some random questions.  I’m a big NFL guy, but I don’t follow college at all, so I have no idea what John was getting at, but he wanted me to ask, now that the SEC has basically become NFL lite,  do you worry about the future of The Big 10 and Wisconsin in particular?

Nope.  The Big 10 has been very competitive the past couple years.  I’m not worried- we have our brand.

If you were a professional wrestler or some other such person, what would your entrance music be?

Hmm… Is it the White Stripes- that seven nation something?  When that one comes on I always feel pumped up.

Seven Nation Army?  Yeah, that is a great choice.  What is the most ridiculous pronunciation of your last name- Dziuda?

I get a lot of “diz-wee-duh”.  I’ve gotten “dizzy-ooda”.  Lots of mispronunciations.  When I break down the correct phonetics for someone I say it as “da-zoo-da”.

You and Kiani just took a trip to Hawaii right?  What was the highlight of that?

We did the Pali Ghost hike- about ten miles with a mile of elevation gain.  At the end, it is just open beach with waterfalls and you’re just sitting in your tent staring out at the ocean.  It was a really intense hike so we just spent the next day on the beach doing just nothing. No cell service at all.  

That sounds incredible- that last part in particular.

Yeah, a couple did need to get airlifted out.  We were like the last people to make it in that day and this couple was showering in the waterfall and a billy goat kicked a rock from like 300 feet up and it hit this girl square in the leg.  So they had this emergency service plug in for the phone.

Well, goats are my spirit animal, so I feel really bad that happened.  Do you have a spirit animal?

I was asked this question at work a couple years ago and I said a hawk.

I think Coach Mark is also a hawk.  What about the hawk do you identify with?

Seeing the big picture and then when it wants something it swoops down and gets it.

What is your favorite swear word?

I don’t know.  I try not to swear- I do sometimes, but I try not to.

You fucking prude.  Goddamnit.  Shit… Alright.  You’re going to have dinner with any celebrity or figure from history, who do you pick?

That’s tough, I’m going to give you a couple.  The first one that comes to mind is Warren Buffet- he’s lived an interesting life and has a lot of knowledge I could learn from.  Whoever I sit down with, I’d want to learn from.  Steve Jobs is another one-

Okay, so you just want to spend time with a lot of really poor people?  Are you a cat or dog person?

Dogs!  Kiani had a dog that passed away right before we moved in and we will probably try to get one this summer. 

That’s fun!  What is the coolest place you’ve traveled to?

I traveled to Thailand for a volunteer trip right after I graduated- it was a village two hours north of Bangkok.  I thought I was just going to be doing construction, but it was a variety of things: touring temples, teaching english, going to an orphanage, a variety of volunteer projects.  Almost no one spoke english- there was a day we went to the police station and they brought their entire staff in and they wanted us to teach them english.  I don’t think they see english speaking people that often.  I also did a two week road trip in South Africa.  We flew into Cape Town, rented a car and did the entire south coast.  We drove through these incredibly rural villages- there was one night we stayed at a hostel in one of them and some guy there invited us to a party.  It was in this shanty town with metal huts people were living in and we were the only white people in this neighborhood party.  They had a laptop they were playing music off of and there was a shipping container people were selling beer out of.  They took us into the like “VIP section” that was inside with a pool table and drinks.  It was pretty wild.

South African VIP!  That is a special time in a young man’s life.  Well, the way that I like to wrap up these interviews is- because you’ve been elevated to this pantheon of athletes of the season- to ask if you have any words of advice for the community or maybe the next Grant Dziuda who is thinking of joining but hasn’t yet?

Consistency is key.

I like it.  Any other parting thoughts?

You didn’t ask me why I picked Waterloo Park!

I didn’t!  Why did you?

So I am switching jobs, but I worked for DPR and… well, I built this park and ampitheatre.

No shit?  You built this?

*bashfully* yeah.  I was responsible for basically where that concrete wall starts and everything to the north.

Ladies and gentlemen, that is what is called burying the lead.  We’re sitting in a park that Grant built.  That’s crazy!

M.J. and I connected for a couple St. Patrick’s Day libations at a surprisingly quiet Drinkwell near our Hyde Park location.  The final athlete to be interviewed for the winter season Shop Athlete Spotlight gamely fielded a number of unusually heavy questions and provided some truly insightful thoughts on topics ranging from parenthood to meditative horse riding to giraffes!

Coach Chad:  The first thing I wanted to touch on was you working out with Kenna, your daughter, because I saw Jack Brown as I was leaving- do you know Jack?

M.J. Hawes:  They guy who never wears a shirt?

Or shoes crucially!

That’s right, and he has a beautiful dog that is usually in the back of his truck.

Yes!  He and I actually had our (SAS!) interview in the back of that truck.  Well his father also works out at The Shop and they work out together.  So I reread his interview and we talked about what it was like to workout with your dad and one of the things that he said was that it brings him comfort to be there with his dad and know that he is taking care of himself.  

Ahhh yeah yeah!  That is so neat.

Kenna has been coming to class with you for a few months now; what does that dynamic mean to you and all that?

Oh man- That is such a good and multifaceted question.  I had been encouraging her to come give it a try for a while now because she is really into yoga and she was a swimmer.  I had been annoying and kept trying but one day, unsolicited, she said she wanted to go (to class).  So we decided to figure out which classes she likes and which coaches she connects with.  As you know, it turns out that she really likes the Strength classes and she really enjoys yours and Keith’s classes and I think she did have a lot of fun at a Fusion class with Bean a while back.  So to answer the question about what it means to me: as a parent to a kid that is about to launch and go out on her own, every chance I can get to do stuff with her that we both enjoy is such a treasured moment.  Also being the parent of a young woman, I think it is so powerful to learn your physical strength at such an early age and what you can do and just not be intimidated by those environments.  I certainly was (intimidated by the gym setting), so I did other fitness things instead of lifting heavy things  or even thinking that I could lift heavy things.  So I really appreciate how she has connected with it and how The Shop has been such a welcoming and non-intimidating community for her that she could just slip into the community.  Even though she is a beginner, she is getting this great advice and support from her coaches and the other members in the class.  She’s learning that all gym environments aren’t the same and that (lifting) is approachable, doable, and something you can do at an early age.

That is really interesting.  The neat thing for me is that I only see her once a week,  and so- you can tell what a beginner looks like- so to see her recently squarely not a beginner anymore has been really fun.

She is picking it up- she really has some chops!  I tell her that she is starting at a place that I was working my way towards even when I was double her age doing this whole weightlifting thing.  

I love seeing that in a young person- getting that confidence from weightlifting.  Now watching you two together, you appear just like any other pair of friends working out.  It seems like a very smooth relationship.  Do you guys have any gym related tiffs?  Like “MOM, What are you DOING?”

*laughing* Oh yeah!  You might not see it happening, but the whispers are there behind the scenes.  For example, she is pretty particular when we leave- like the workout can’t spill over the hour.  It is like she is time managing me.

Oh that is funny, I assumed it was the other way around with you two.

It is pretty funny.  Sometimes we just poke fun at each other, but we do have a good relationship in that way.  

It definitely seems like you have a good thing going on.  Do you have any other people that you’ve developed fun relationships with in class?

I just love our 6am crew- all the familiar faces.  We don’t necessarily spend a lot of time talking, but I feel like we have a shared connection just based on our shared commitment to the time and the space.  Seeing Michelle, or Shelly, or Virginia & Janani, Kelly, Doak, and Grant and all the folks that travel in that pack- everyone just gets along nicely and I really enjoy that.

That is something I always highlight when giving a tour- that you should try as many classes at different times as you can, but once you start to settle in you will find a gravity to the people you go to class with.

Yeah, isn’t that weird?  And my schedule has been weird lately, so I went over to a class at Manor in the evening and the class that was heading out was really boisterous and taking their time leaving, and then the class that I was in was totally subdued.  It was a completely different vibe.  It is so funny how it can be a completely different environment or energy.  

You mentioned before I started recording that you and Shelly and Michelle were thinking of forming a Brains & Brawn team.  What sort of advantage do you think that particular group might have?  Where would your strengths be?

We are some of the elder stateswomen of the larger community, so I’m thinking what we might lack from a pure power perspective, we have a serious advantage in longevity and wisdom on our side, so we can overcome.

Frankly, I don’t think the three of you are lacking on the power side either!

Well, yeah Shelly and Michelle are definitely strong, so they can bring it with brains and brawn.  I’m still working on the brawn!

Well, you’re damn sure getting there!  How did you come to Dane’s Body Shop?

I was working out at a gym in Tarrytown that had a similar format, and they did a good job, but they decided to change up their format completely and it wasn’t for me.  They had a very nice community- Alexis (Dacy) was one of them- and she came over (to Dane’s) from the same place.  So I tried it and went through that awkward newbie phase and there were a few moments where I didn’t know if I was going to keep going.  When you come into a new place and you’re trying to figure out where you fit in and what the norms are and aren’t sure if it is going to work out, but Michelle started shortly after that and we ended up being in similar classes and it was nice to have a newbie buddy that I could navigate that awkward phase with.

That is true even as a coach- Dane does this thing when he has someone he is considering hiring where he just gives them a free membership to see if they like what The Shop does, does The Shop like what they do.  Kind of an extended courtship; mine lasted like six months!  There was a day in the beginning when I came home from a hybrid class and my wife, girlfriend at the time, was home on a break from grad school and was like “how was that class at that place you might work honey?” and I just shushed her and shook my head as I walked to the bathroom.  She kind of followed me and I just started taking off my clothes and then, standing over the bath tub, proceeded to wring buckets of sweat out of them.  She was like, “what did they do to you???”.  Even as a coach, I had serious doubts at the beginning.  But after a week or two, I found some members that I really vibed with.  Some dude named Murphy I remember partnered with me several times and made it all feel more comfortable.

You hear about stuff like that all the time talking to members.  When I read your interviews I see how the community helps people to find that comfort.  It actually goes back to what I was saying earlier about Kenna- everybody is very supportive of wherever you are at.  It is like a “no judgement, all encouragement zone” and I really appreciate that.

Is she starting to find her own connections outside of you?  I know I am developing a fun little repartee with her.

Yeah!  She and Shelly talk and the other day I saw Doak very sweetly asking her questions.  I try not to be the helicopter mom and to just let her find her own connections.  I try to do that in general, so it is important to do it at Dane’s also!

That is going to be great practice for her going off to college and dealing with people of different ages.  I want to switch gears slightly- you’re in New Mexico often, why are you in New Mexico often?

I guess I just like it there.  I’m not from Texas, as you recall, but I really like living in Austin and hope to stay in the general vicinity for the duration, but I also like the change of scenery and we have the good fortune of being able to find another place.  Our criteria was that it had to be drivable-

It is Santa Fe right?

Yeah, we wanted to be able to take our dogs.  And it had to be a different climate- so when you draw a one-day-drivable map from Austin, there really aren’t many choices.  It was almost by default that we picked it.

There is an old Texas saying, “the sun has riz, the sun has set, and we ain’t out of Texas yet”.  Have you heard that one?

*big laughter* I hope you put that in the transcript so that I can remember that.

I’ll put it in just for your benefit!

Thank you!  So it is just a place to escape.

Aside from just the climate can you talk a little bit about the difference in like pace and feel from Austin?

There are similarities and there are huge differences.  Austin has such a youthful energy and vibe and Santa Fe is the opposite- it is a place people have historically retired to.  I always notice that out and about.  There was a gym I used to go to up there and we called it “the old man gym” because it was just where the seniors hung out to get their workout in and do their kibitzing.  It is also a little different because of its cultural heritage- the Native American population and the Spanish influence.  I think the things that are similar is that there is a strong fitness culture there-

Really?  I wouldn’t have guessed that.

Yeah, it is more like skiing and mountain biking- hiking.  They are taking advantage of the outdoor activities there.  Less from a gym perspective, but more people being excited to be outside and active.  The food also.

I always just think lots of corn and peppers when I think Santa Fe.

The diversity in cuisine is really changing!  Just like everywhere else in the “great migration”, people are moving out of west coast towns and settling there.  So it is diversifying in terms of its population.  So, for example, it isn’t difficult to find good Chinese food there or even decent Indian food.  And obviously the art scene- they are more visual arts as opposed to the music here in Austin, but I think there are spaces where they really respect and respect the arts.

Now I’ve actually seen you in Santa Fe because you took brilliant advantage of our virtual workouts during the pandemic- is there a difference between Santa Fe M.J. as opposed to Austin M.J.?

That is a good question.  Santa Fe M.J. is probably a little more chill because I’m working less- not on a schedule.  My family might say I’m easier to get along with because I’m not on a crazy work schedule.  Other than that, no-

You don’t arrive and magically channel the spirit of Georgia O’Keefe?

Oh I’ve got a hat I wear up there and some more Sante Fe style clothes.  

You also just got back from New York City and with that in mind it occurred to me that a revelatory question to ask someone is, “what did you do while you were in New York?”.  It is such an incredible city with so much of everything that you can tell a lot about someone by asking what they did with that opportunity.

That’s a great question!  Kenna was with me and we were back in northern New Jersey to celebrate my dad’s 92nd birthday.  That was the primary purpose of the trip- family.  Then Kenna and I went into the city because we hadn’t been in since the pandemic.  I was a little apprehensive because the city has suffered some set backs and crime is more abundant so I wasn’t sure what we were getting ourselves into.  

Like the Son of Sam summer?

Well actually, people are getting pushed onto subway tracks and stuff- not pretty crime!  But, it wasn’t as bad as people were depicting and we were in the subways with no issue. So we did four or five things: one is we went to the Neue Gallery which focuses on German & Austrian art and it is a really nice experience because it is a small gallery and you can really consume the entire exhibit unlike something that is so overwhelming like The Met.  Another highlight was obviously eating- trying to get caught up on some of the good eats there-

What were the food highlights? Because I think that says a lot too.

We still lament the quality of Chinese food in Austin, so we made sure to hit that.  Aside from our friends, Home Slice, down the street, the quality of pizza is still a work in progress in Austin, and we also did a nice Italian dinner as well.  So those were the priorities- and I hate to do this because it sounds a little materialistic, but Kenna and I did a little bit of shopping because she has some big events coming up around graduation.  So endless walking around and popping in places, just giving her a sense for the city.  And the last thing for me was a little bit of nostalgia, because I lived there after I finished school.  We walked by my first apartment and just by coincidence, on the corner of the block where my first apartment is, there is this really famous Ukrainian diner.  Given current world events we were excited to check that out as well.  A little bit of history, a little bit of food, and a little bit of commerce.

So what I’d draw from that is this is a well-rounded person who enjoys living life and has reasonable amounts of caution, but doesn’t let it inhibit them.  Very nice!  Speaking of things you need to be cautious about, I wanted to talk about horsies.  So you have taken up riding horses and you used to ride as well- talk a little bit about your history with these beasts and what you’re doing now.

I’m going to show you a picture of my horse- which I’m technically leasing so that just means I subsidize her lifestyle.  *passes me her phone to show me her magnificent pink and brown horse* That is Pinky- she is a warmblood which is a cross between a German warmblood and usually a thoroughbred of some sort.  I started riding when I was 5 or 6 and I was one of those crazy horse-riding girls.  I ride English- that is with the smaller saddles versus Western riders which is a bit more common in Texas.  It was my sport- I didn’t do traditional sports, that was kind of my rebellion against this sports culture in my hometown.  So I competed where I could and I used to jump horses.  I had to take a hiatus in college, but when I hit 30 I had enough disposable income that I could start doing it again, so I got a horse when my husband and I were living in San Diego.  I got really good at it again, but then I got pregnant with Kenna and it was time to hang up my boots for a while.  One of the reasons we were excited to move to Texas was that it might be easier for me to balance work and horses- living in California, it just wasn’t feasible.  Now that Kenna is ready to launch it felt like the right time to get back into it.

I love that you keep using the verb “launch”.

Yes!  I like that so much better than empty-nesting or the other sad terms.

Yeah, it is like you’re a NASA scientist.

Exactly!  Like I’m just shooting her off like a rocket into her adulthood.  

More epic.  So what does your riding these days consist of?

Getting my ass kicked basically!  Just trying to get my form and muscles back.  Riding is such a unique sport because you have to be in such good communication with your horse.  You have to figure out every horse and how they behave.  I really thought getting back into it would be easy because I’ve been doing all of these workouts at Dane’s and all of that is true but, you’re still using muscle groups that are `100% different.  It really does make a difference to have the core strength built up.  But still, I might be able to survive The Murph or Tire Tyrant, but sometimes just jumping around a course with a horse still takes my breath away.

And there is that element of unpredictability to it right?

Yeah, sometimes I think I’m being a real idiot because it is a really risky sport, but you only live once!

The great thing about barbells is they tend to not have a mind of their own!

Indeed, indeed- you are in control… most of the time.  So I’m just trying to get my form back and get more comfortable jumping the fences I jumped before.

Do you have any words for what horse riding means to you?  As someone who knows nothing about riding horses, I assume there is a major element of freedom to it.

There is some of that for sure.  I think for me the thing is you can’t be a hysterical mess around a horse because they vibe off of you and so you just have to be calm and in tune with another animal.  You can’t be thinking about other things, so for me it is a huge stress reliever and a way to wipe out what might be nagging you on a given day.  

That kind of relates back to something Anna (Grimes) said in my interview with her a couple weeks ago.  She was talking about how movement can be meditation.  She was kind of pushing back against the idea that stillness had to be a part of meditation.

100%, I can totally relate to her comment in that regard.  I feel like the fitness routines I have keep my stress and anxiety at bay.  The movement helps create the distraction to go into that (calm) space.  Being still, it is so much harder to control that monkey mind.

Just real quick, we’ve danced around the idea of you being busy at work and such and I know you work for Apple, so I just wanted to touch briefly on what you do.

I’ve worked with them since 2004, so I’ve seen a lot-

That is before the iphone!

Yeah, itunes was brand new.  Most of my time has been spent in customer experience and support, but now that I’m edging toward the twilight of my career I do people support.  I manage a team of about 150 people around the world who’s job it is to answer employee questions or concerns and making sure those employees get the needed information so they are able to do their job and not be distracted from day to day work.  Managing teams around the world is just a constant thing.

Managing the answer givers?  That feels like levels upon levels.

*laughing* Yeah, I suppose it kind of is.

And with timezones, I can see that spilling all over your day.

Oh yeah, I talk to Europe early in the morning and then I’m talking to Singapore and China in the evenings.  My schedule is definitely not my own, so I have to find windows and create boundaries.  But I love it and it is why I have so many apple t-shirts to workout in!

That is really interesting.  Well, we will move into a few random questions before we wrap up-

These are the questions I’m afraid of!

We talked about your relationship with horses.  If you were to pick an animal to represent you that isn’t a horse, what is the M.J. animal?

I’m going to say a giraffe- I really would have picked horse, but since you took that off the table, I went with giraffe because I think they generally have a fairly calm presence.  I’ve been told I have a calm presence and I think that just might be me being good at masking what is going on inside.  Giraffes hang out in smaller groups and I’m kind of a small group kinda gal.  I’ve been in so many professional development settings with personality tests, so I know I like to see things from the treetops.

I was guessing something to do with perspective would play into that answer.  What is your zodiac sign?

I’m a Leo, so a land sign.

Maybe it makes sense that you picked giraffe, cause I’m sure a lion would like a giraffe as well!  Maybe it is just because you are a calm person, but I don’t think of you as someone who swears a lot.  Do you have a favorite swear word?

*mischievous giggle* You’re right that I don’t swear too much, but historically it might be “goddamn it”.  There is a story that my mom & grandma used to tell where, apparently my mom would drop a “goddamn” frequently, because apparently when I was three the dog made me mad, so I pushed it and said “get out of my way you goddamn dog!”.  I think that one stuck in the lexicon.

I would imagine with your job in traveling that you’ve done karaoke a few times?

Oh god… no I avoid that at the plague.  That would be like my worst nightmare.

That is a helluva answer because I was setting myself up to ask if you had a go to karaoke song!

No!  I don’t even want to get on the stage.  I have to do a lot of public speaking for work and I really have to work on that.

Great answer!  Dinner party question: you have the chance to sit down with 1-3 people currently living or from history to dine and talk- who do you choose?

This is one I should have thought about ahead of time because it is a hard one.  Hmm… One is my dad.  No shade to my mom, but I would pick my dad.  Hmm… who else would I pick?  If I’m combining everyone together, I’m going to add Winston Churchill-

He’s on my list too!

Who would be the third?  Oh geez…  I don’t have a name that comes to mind, but the additional element I’d want to introduce into the party to throw some contrast into the old white male selections would either be a female historical trend-setter or innovator or a current one.  I’m struggling to think of.

I think Catherine The Great would be a solid fit with Winston anyway- I don’t know your dad.

That would be a good one.  Maybe something a little bit more contemporary, but that is the right direction.

I’m always intrigued when someone picks someone who is actually in their life.  Why your dad?

The short answer is, and I’d be happy to elaborate if you think that would be interesting, he has a really interesting life story and he is an extremely well-read and well educated person with diverse interests and knowledge.  Ever time I talk to him, I learn something from him.  

I’m intrigued enough, I actually do want to hear more.

One of the reasons he is an interesting man is he was a Roman Catholic Priest for twenty plus years in New York City before he met and married my mom.  He was very classically educated and has four different degrees in different areas.  He knows all the classics and has obviously led a very spiritual life, then when he turned forty he married my mom and didn’t have a dime to his name.  So he had to reinvent himself at the age of forty and became a parent of two kids and a working professional.  He had to leave a life that he grew up in and his departure was based on things that were really core to him and also some concerns about the institution he was representing and where that was going.  He made a major change and had a very interesting 2nd, 3rd, 4th chapter of his life.  

It is always kind of a shame when you hear the Catholic Priest punchline.  Very much deserved by the bad actors and the institution, but some of the most interesting people are Catholic Priests.  I think my first interview ever was a long form discussion with a Catholic Priest for a project in college.

They get great education.

I love talking to someone who can surprise me, and I was so surprised by this person.

(My dad) was part of the church at the time that was advocating for civil rights and participating in the marches and just being active socially.  He was in a cohort of people who bailed out all at the same time given the unfortunate things that were happening within the church.  A lot of his friends were former priests and nuns as crazy as that sounds.

I actually might need to update my dinner list to have your dad on it!  I read a lot of biographies and one of the things I’m morbidly fascinated by are last words.  What would your last words be?

I don’t know if I can come up with anything statement oriented.  I’d probably pick a couple key words about what I felt like my life and ethos is all about.  I’ll just react spontaneously to your question and say: “grateful” comes to the top of the list, “loved” I feel really privileged to have come from a really loving family and to live in a loving family now, and I would probably try to come up with some other word that represents my interest and care for others.

That is great!  That is a new one I’ve never asked before, so you had no way to prepare for it.  I was wondering if it was too hard a question- a little too heavy.

Well it definitely is heavy, but fortunately you asked it during my second glass of wine-

Not fortune, that is planning!

I should know, you’re the master.  Can I take the table and turn it on you and ask what yours would be?

Wow.  I did not expect you to take this table and turn it around on me.

Have another swig of beer, it helps the thinking process!

Then my final words would be, “Never try to turn the tables on an interviewer”.

Touché!

No, your answer is really great and I’m finding it hard to not be swayed by it.  Okay, so it being St. Patrick’s Day, it might be something like, “You may kill me, *switching to cartoonish Irish accent* but yer never gonna be able to get my Lucky Charms”!  So that is my bullshit answer and I’ll try to think of a better one.  That is actually a nice button to end on.  Did you have anything else you wanted to say that I haven’t already probed you on.

Just that I appreciate you and The Shop and the larger community and I’m so grateful that I found it and that I get to be a part of it!

And the feeling is mutual; we are better for having you in that larger community!

Melanie Pearce is an incandescent regular attendee of the early morning classes at Manor Road and the F’n Go Run Group.  We grabbed a table on the patio of Honeymoon Spirit Lounge on a perfect Thursday evening in October and indulged in some artfully mixed cocktails.  Read on to be charmed by Mel’s palpable love of adventure and the Shop Community or to learn an embarrassing story from both the interviewee and the interviewer!

Coach Chad: I asked the coaching staff if they had any questions for you and John actually came out hot on this one-

Mel Pearce: Oh… I’m sure.

How do you feel about (LSU Football Head Coach) Ed Orgeron getting fired?

That is coming in hot.  I love Coach O- it is pretty sad.  I’m bummed about it, but we will see. 

I love how composed you are being- not giving John the satisfaction.  He also wanted to know your favorite Cajun food dish.

Mmm… This is a really interesting question because I’m a weirdo Cajun-

But you are Cajun?

Yes and no- I wasn’t born there but I grew up there.

So culturally Cajun?

Right!  I don’t eat a lot of meat, so i would say like a seafood gumbo or a Boudin bowl

What is the official dance of Lafayette?

Oh!  Cajun dancing- it is like a two step, but a little more freestyle.  It is pretty distinct when you see it.  I could show it to you some time.

You and I have been meaning to hang out more, so maybe next time I will tap you for some Cajun dancing lessons.  Well John clearly had an idea of where you come from heading into this, but could you give a brief rundown of where you are from and how you got to Austin for our readers?

I was born in Delaware-

Very Cajun!

Oh yes, deep in Cajun country.

That’s why people in Delaware really say it (goes into a spot on Cajun accent) “Delaway-uh” cause dey so deep into dat Cajun Countray!

Oh yes and Coach O is also from Delaware.

Right… wait, really?

Oh no!  He’s from deep deep in the boot of Louisiana.

So Cajun that he is actually a crawdad.

Exactly!  So born in Delaware then moved to Maryland, Florida, Missouri, and then Louisiana.

Wow- Military kid?

No, my mom was a badass sales woman and she just got moved to a bunch of different places-

She’s a mercenary isn’t she?

Well yeah, she’s in the CIA.

Alright.  Well I don’t think you’re supposed to say that on a recording, but fair enough.

*laughing* Yeah, you’ll have to cut that out.

Right right- or you’ll cut me out.

Yeah yeah.  I moved to Louisiana in 5th grade and was there through college.  I moved to Austin in 2010 for grad school-

What was your focus in grad school?

Counseling.  And then when I finished, I wanted to stay in Austin so I got a job at UT and then I moved to Sacramento for two and a half years and then moved back.

When did you move back?

Right before the pandemic…

Welcome home honey!  Wasn’t it so much better to be in a place you love  during the pandemic?  I had just moved back to Austin as well and I count my lucky stars that we made that move when we did.

Yeah, I had my little friend pod and we would play board games or swim in their pool- we were together all the time.

I have a little bit of experience with you and you actually helped my wife out with some career stuff because you describe yourself as a matchmaker for careers.  Can you talk about that a bit?

Yeah!  I went for more of a career counseling route than more traditional therapy.  When I moved back to Austin, I started working with grad students and I basically do employer relations.  I try to find companies looking for specialized, advanced skills and connect the companies with students.

Now that skill as a matchmaker- does that translate to any other areas of life?  Are you a matchmaker in your social circles?

That’s a good question!  You know, I have played that role a time or two.  It isn’t my forte, but I’ve definitely arranged it for person a and person b to be in the same place at the same time.

Another question in that realm that occurred to me was, out of all the coaches at The Shop, if you could give them a different job, what would it be?  Not that they aren’t good at their current job, but if one of them came to you and said “you need to get me the hell out of this place- Dane has gotten too handsome, I can’t work for him any more”, who would you save?

Okay!  We can start with Dane and I would say standup comedy.  Maybe some acting.

When I first started working at The Shop, he and another coach and I took some improv classes together.  He does have some funnies.  That’s a good one!

I have more!  Beth Reyburn should go into pottery-

She’s really damn good!  Have you seen her work?

No I actually haven’t.

That is an incredible call because she has gotten amazing with pottery.  The past couple Christmases she has given the members of the management team custom made pieces.  Absolutely gorgeous.

Wow!  Keith should be a physical therapist.

He does have that interest in the really granular aspects of training.

He is really good at diagnosing where your weak points are.  This would be a good second drink question!

If another occurs to you, just call it out.  I always do a little bit of instagram stalking before these interviews and your last posting was a series of photos from ACL, what was the high point of your experience?  I mean, the fact that it happened at all is a high point obviously.

I am detoxing this week-

Detoxing with a margarita?

*huge laughter*. Okay. Alright!  I was detoxing until Thursday night!  My uncle and his partner came into town and their two friends joined us, so I had an entourage of four gay guys all weekend.

Some of my favorite memories have been with an entourage of four gay guys.

*more big laughter* Yes!  By Thursday we were already hitting a drag show.  Friday was ACL- George Strait.  This was my 11th ACL- my first year was 2006 and it was where my love of Austin started.

Do you have a favorite memory from that year?

Tom Petty… playing in the rain.

Ugh… That is so cool!  With such a profound love of the city, can you describe a “perfect Austin weekend”?

First thing is first, (coming out of the weekend)I am going to Dane’s Body Shop to workout.  Preferably a 6:30am class on a Monday with Coach Chad.  Okay, so let’s say it is 8:30am on a Saturday- I’m at Stormie’s class.  It is a beautiful day- then maybe I grab a coffee and a breakfast taco.

Favorite place for the coffee and taco situation?

Oh my gosh- this is a really tough question.  Right now I’m liking Palomino- it is really close to where I live.  Dear Diary is another one I really like-

This is where I reveal that you weren’t actually elected Athlete of the Season- it is just an elaborate ruse I’ve concocted to figure out the best places for coffee and tacos.

Ha!  I really love Vera Cruz- their tacos are amazing.

*server comes by to ask if we are doing okay*

Are you down for another round?

I mean, I’m detoxing, so yes!

Okay, so it is late Saturday morning- that is as far into this fantasy weekend as we’ve gotten.

So then I’m going for a hike on the greenbelt maybe.  After the hike I probably take a trip to Whole Foods-

Gotta support the evil empire!  Hear that Jeffrey Bezos? She is diligent in her tithing to you.

*laughing more- it really is a good laugh guys*. Then I am probably rolling into happy hour with some friends- maybe the ABGB.  Then maybe heading to dinner somewhere; right now my favorite dinner spot is Suerte.  You’ve gotta go- it is so good.  Then maybe going out somewhere.  Lately it has been White Horse.  Oh wait!  Before White Horse, maybe I hit a show somewhere like the Scoot Inn.

So we’re shutting things down rowdy at White Horse.  We roll out of bed on Sunday morning-

Sundays are my yoga days.  I bounce around to different places.  Then probably back to Whole Foods or something.  I really like to grocery shop.  

I think we need to stage a Whole Foods intervention for you!  Nah, that’s cool.  So you’re probably spending at least a little time at your house on this perfect weekend- cause you just bought a house right?

Yes!  That was quite the journey with the pandemic and everything, but I moved in in July.

If I were to come over to Casa Mel, describe for me what I might see?  What is your style?

I’m a minimalist.  I don’t like a lot of stuff.

I’m going to editorialize here and say that my wife is an incredible nester, but I am also a hard core minimalist and she is very good at decorating, but it is a lot of stuff.  She’s great at decorating- I think she calls it neo-bohemian or something.

Okay- I would say I’m like a boho minimalist?  *laughs* Yeah, I moved in July and I still don’t have anything on the walls because I’m kind of digging the vibe.  It is also a super small house, so I just don’t have a lot of stuff.

So when you finally do hang something on the wall, what is it?

Oh god- I have a billion ACL posters that are all framed and I don’t know where to put them!  This is my big conundrum right now.

Do you know Patty and AJ?

No I don’t think so-

They are evening people, so you may not have encountered them.  Patty was the first ever Manor Athlete of the season and the two of them are tremendous people.  They live very close to the Shop and their house is like literally an art gallery.  It is the most impressively decorated place I have ever seen.  If you haven’t met them already you have to-

I feel like I love them already.

And AJ works for Whole Foods, so he is your man on the inside.  So there are some checkmarks for Athlete of the Season candidates: regular attendance, positive attitude, but I think maybe the biggest one is just connecting to other members.  You seem to be one of the biggest participants in what I call “Shop sub-communities”.  We are one community, but one of the cool things are these sub groups of people who hang out together outside of class.  You are in the run group, so can you talk about that and any other groups you hang out with?

This is great- I was hoping to plug the F’n Go Run Group-

Well then before we move on- plug it!  What is the pitch?

Run Group is so much fun!  I think people are intimidated, but the truth is we talk a lot.  We do anywhere from 3-6 miles, but it is always with breaks.  There are the faster people, and more intermediate runners, and people who just want to take it easy so there is a place for anyone.  We also do a lot of happy hours which is my forte.

It certainly sounds like you are experienced in happy hours.  That is actually what you got your grad degree in isn’t it?  Happy Hour is counseling in my experience.

Oh yeah, yeah, it is all the same!  Sometimes the group is big and sometimes it is small.  If anyone is thinking of joining us you totally should!  If you just want to come to happy hour you should.  There is a spreadsheet (that says when and where the meetings take place)-

And that spreadsheet is accessible to all members- if you’re newer, you received a link to it when you got your welcoming email after signing up!  I will link to it in this interview!  Now you come to the 5:30am and 6:30am classes usually right?  I feel like that is a specific community of its own.

It is!  (morning class attendees) Emily and Melissa Taylor take an evening class on Thursdays and I freaking love them, so I want to start taking that class with them so I can meet more members even though it isn’t my favorite to workout in the evening.

I’m the same way- the workout is what sets the pace for my day.

Exactly and then I don’t have to worry about it.  But I want to start going to other times so I can infiltrate other groups.

“Infiltrate”, I like that!  If you have any flexibility for midday class, the 11:45am class at Hyde Park would be a fascinating community for you to infiltrate.  I love my 11:45am class at Manor, but at Hyde Park there are a lot of people who have been members for a very long time and they present a very unique vibe.

Chad, that would be so outside of my box!  Maybe I will do that.

So that is a goal, but do you have any goals in life that you’re working on?  I love the fitness goals, but just in general- what are you targeting in life?

I’m starting to plan a lot of travel- I used to vagabond around quite a bit.  I lived in New Zealand and Australia- I lived in a van.  I would live a couple months in one place-

Your CIA mother employed you as a sniper!

*big laugh* Yes!  Like I said, she’s a badass.

I want to meet your mom, bring her to The Shop next time she is in town.

I should!  She’s a lot.

What’s her name?  I want to see how much I can creepily talk about your mom during this interview.

Her name is Gloria… She goes by “Glo”.

GLO!  I love it!

She would kill me if she knew I was talking about this.  Her middle name is so fitting for her, but it was actually a mistake on her birth certificate.  Her name is Gloria Martini.

GLORIA MARTINI???

She’s the youngest of six, so by the time she came along it was like “sorry we didn’t double check it”.

That is fantastic.  What were we talking about.  I know we were talking about your mom-

Goals?

Oh that is right- you were talking about travel.

I’m going to do a bit more traveling- I’ve got a couple things in December.  I’m actually going to go to Puerto Rico with a couple other members over Christmas.  I’m going to go to New York in the beginning of December.

And there are a lot of Puerto Ricans in New York, so you can ease into it!  Do you speak Spanish?

Oh Chad, I should.  I’ve taken so many classes and taken lessons.

Well this is a chance for us to plug another member!  Do you know Janani and Virginia?

Yes!  Virginia teaches Spanish right?

I started taking classes with her right before the pandemic in person and then she switched to virtual y mi español es mucho más mejor ahora!

I’ve heard you speak Spanish!

I have so much work to do, but any gains I’ve made are all her.  They are small group classes and she is just fantastic.

Let’s plug her- can you link to that as well?

Yes!  The Language House- I’ll link to it!

Janani and Virginia- I also f*cking love them.  Man it is like any member you bring up I get so excited.  And then I’m also going back to Lafayette of course- I go back a lot.

To see Gloria Martini?  Is she still there?

No, she’s on the east coast now.  It is my friend-family.  I’ve got really really close girl friends who are like sisters to me and they all still live there.  When I moved back from Sacramento, they were all like “what are you doing, move back to Lafayette instead!” and I really considered it.

Cool cool.  I always like to conclude with some just completely random questions that have no bearing on anything.  I think John kind of covered some random ground up top.  I asked a member in the class I just coached and he told me to just ask you what the most embarrassing moment of your life was.

In my life?  Oh there are so many!

Pick one!  A moment that you’re comfortable sharing with your entire DBS community.

Let me think of something that is appropriate for this interview.

Meh, “appropriate” is kind of relative.  Back in the day I had a long and entertaining interview with a Spotlight Athlete and our detailed conversation about merkins made it into the transcript.  There is a wide lane for appropriate- it is more about what you are comfortable with.

I feel like anything I say is too much!  This is so tough.

I’ll throw one out as an ice breaker.  I had been a trainer for like two years when we moved to Austin from Chicago and I started at Dane’s Body Shop.  I was already super intimidated by some of the trainers they had at the time who were very knowledgeable and very experienced.  I had just been given my first couple classes and was already having some imposter syndrome when I went to demo a burpee and I just ripped a fart.  It was a moment where I had three paths:  the most obvious was to just leave class in that moment and never be seen again, I could pretend it didn’t happen, and the third option was the one I chose which was to stop class, turn off the music and acknowledge what just happened.  I think that was the moment where I earned my first cred at The Shop.  Not even remotely the most embarrassing thing that has happened to me- just an example

Okay, so I have a lot of embarrassing things I could say and maybe after we finish recording I’ll tell you more.  But when I was traveling in Australia, I was really gung ho about learning to surf; it is a big part of the culture there.  What most silly young Americans don’t realize is that there are a lot of riptides in Australia.  My friend and I were hung over and hanging out on the beach and she was napping so I just decided to go for it.  So I paddled out a little further and before I knew it, I’m caught in a super vicious riptide- I was so far away from the shore.  I started to realize that I’m swimming and not going anywhere and that I’m going to be eaten by a shark and then I started hyperventilating- just freaking out.  I’m just thinking this is the end and I’m really hyperventilating and then I see this guy and, in my mind it is in slo-mo and he was like David Hasselhoff, and I see him jump in the water.  I realize that this guy looks pretty cute from afar and he is swimming aggressively toward me and I might be getting rescued-

And you’re getting a little turned on?

*big laughter* Right?  And I’m hyperventilating at the same time.

That actually sounds incredible, I want this experience.

So I’m crying and this hot Australian man is coming my way.  He gets closer to me and very seriously starts yelling “are you okay?” and I was like “yeah, I’m fine!”.  

You think you’re dying but you’re “fine”?

He was just like “You look like you’re in distress” and so I said “no, I’m good”.  Then he was like “you’re in distress” and I responded “okay, maybe a little”.  So he said, “alright, I’m going to rescue you then”.  So I get on his back and he swam me to the shore.  He was like “you were in some serious trouble there” and I was just trying to play it cool- I didn’t want to be a silly American.  

That is a fantastic story.  Our experiences with Australian men are very different- most of mine involve breaking up fist fights.

I can see that too!

Speaking of fights, would you rather fight one hundred duck-sized horses or one horse-sized duck?

*giggling*. Duck sized horses- because they’d be so cute!

That is the right answer.  Ducks already have a part of their anatomy that is very pronounced and if you scaled that to a horse size it is positively the stuff of nightmares.  I’m not going to go into details, but readers can look it up.  Okay, so you’re having a dinner party at your house, your new house-

And we will have one of those one day!

Absolutely- but before I get invited, you get to invite three celebrities or any other famous figures, who do you go with?

Okay, so this is pretty easy.  The first one is Eddie Vedder.

You’re a big Pearl Jam person?

Huge!

Okay, we will talk more about that after we turn this recorder off.

Okay!  Obama.

We’re keeping serious Chicago vibes here-

And Beyonce!

It’s good.  I feel like with Obama and Eddie, we’re having a really good conversation and everyone is taking turns and then you drop Beyonce in and the whole thing gets unbalanced.  But maybe you need someone like that- something asymmetrical in terms of personalities.  That is good- I love how quick you were to answer that.  Okay, so you are dictator for the day and you get to make 2-3 edicts that everyone has to follow- completely tyrannical stuff- what sort of decrees would you issue.

I have a thing with waste- like with food or plastic- people who aren’t eco-conscience.  I don’t know how I’d enforce it though.

That is good and it also doesn’t have to be a punitive decree.  Like everyone who rescues a puppy gets a parade.

Well I love animals, so that is a good one.  Okay, so I think honesty is super important so I think people should live with authenticity.

So like if someone lies, they burst into flames?  That’s good, I like that.

Sure, there we go Chad- if you lie, you burst into flames.

*deep accusatory voice* How many lies have you told during this interview Melanie… *normal voice* Cause you on fire girl!  Yeow!  Broadly speaking, if you were an animal, what animal would you say you identify with?

Giraffe.

Giraffe???  Talk to me about that.  Why that?

Ever since I was little I’ve had this affinity with giraffes.  I just love giraffes.  I have been to South Africa and I saw one in person and I almost lost my mind.  They are just so gentle and when they run it is so beautiful.

That is really good!  Doing these interviews is my favorite thing that I get to do at The Shop because I think it is so important to put a spotlight on some of the incredible people we have in our community.  So I like to finish these interviews kind of open ended and just ask you if you have anything else you’d like to say.

You’re right- the people in this community are incredible.  I’ve been to a lot of gyms in my time and I feel by far the most invested in the community (at The Shop).  I just feel so welcomed and that is my goal to make people feel welcomed into the community.  I just f*cking love the people here.  So thank you for doing (these interviews) and the fact that the coaches vote on (Shop Athlete Spotlight) is just so sweet.

Any advice?  You’re now in what I call the pantheon of Spotlight Athletes- you are a goddess as it were and the people seek your wisdom.  What can you give them?

I can give you F’n Go Run Group!

Click on the link!

I just want to close on… GEAUX TIGERS!

I felt like some sort of fancy pants drug dealer character as I hosted Spotlight Athlete, Natalie Cincotta at my luxurious pool earlier this month.  By “luxurious pool” of course I mean the communal pool in my humble apartment complex and by “Natalie Cincotta” of course I mean the wildly curious world traveler whose power clean is a thing of most radiant beauty and whose thirst for post-war German erotica knows no bounds!

Coach Chad  
No, that’s a good place to start. You’ve really never been interviewed?  And you’re about to defend your thesis.

Natalie  Cincotta
I’ve done presentations and workshops and stuff like that, but not not an interview. Not like this. I’d like to be on a podcast though, there are a lot of good history podcasts out there.

Chad  
Well, you mentioned Lauren (Lichterman), you could potentially go on her “Tell Me More About That” podcast, which I thought was a delight when I was on!

Natalie  
That’s a good idea.

Chad  
So we’ve had the pleasure of hanging out a couple times. But the two most obvious things I know about you are that you’re a history doctoral student, and you are someone who lifts weights pretty damn well. You do a good job of picking the heavy things back up and then setting them back down again. So I wanted to ask basically five questions at once: How did you get into history? How did you get into lifting weights?  AND if you can tie that process together? Can you find a thread as to why? What stoked your interest in both of those things?

Natalie  
Oh, that’s such an interesting way to put it. Well, for me, getting into history has been just an interest that I have cultivated over a very long period of time, like since I was a kid.

Chad  
Can you point to specific early interest in history?

Natalie  
I grew up reading a lot of historical fiction and nonfiction. One book that was really impactful when I was young was “The Diary of Anne Frank”. That’s how I actually got interested in Holocaust studies- I read a lot of Holocaust memoirs and things like that.  I had also grown up hearing a lot about my Oma, which is German for grandmother. She grew up in Germany and emigrated to Australia. She shared a lot about her experiences and our family’s history with me too. Then when I was in high school, I pretty much just took every history subject elective that I could, I actually graduated with more than half of my credit (being) history credit.

Chad  
This was high school???

Natalie  
Yeah! It wasn’t just the required (history) we had subjects that you could choose too;  ancient history, modern history, and then an extension course that was about historiography, or essentially how people write history.

Chad  
That sounds so incredibly different from the American system- in my experience anyway, we don’t have anywhere near that sort of optionality.

Natalie  
 I remember one of my projects was answering the question, why did the Titanic sink? And I did all of this different research that culminated in a presentation; I remember going online and looking at reports on the types of metal and iron they use to build the ship and how that that played a role-

Chad  
 so what was your chief culprit?

Natalie  
I think I said it was ego. At the end of the day, the people just wanted to build this thing really fast and didn’t want to heed anybody’s warnings.

Chad  
So with history, it seems like a pretty like organic thing where you just happened upon something compelling like “The Diary of Anne Frank” and that bridged into a larger interest.  So how does that differ from your entree into fitness and lifting?

Natalie  
Well, I initially came to Danes Body Shop, because one of my friends went there and she really enjoyed it; she really enjoyed the community. She had also gotten a lot stronger. And I was like, I want to do that! That looks fun!

Chad  
I need to be able to fight this bitch?  

Natalie  
Yeah, yeah!  And so I took a community workout with her and it was a really good vibe.  I didn’t know anything really about lifting a barbell, I’d never done it before. And it just became really, really addictive. I think I liked that- that I didn’t really know what I was doing. It was challenging and I think that that is maybe what that connecting point (between lifting and history) is, right? I’m just trying out things that I don’t know much about and trying to figure them out and get better at them.

Chad  
That’s cool. I like that.  So your focus of study is specifically on East Germany right?

Natalie  
West Germany.

Chad  
 Sorry!  I legitimately had it in my head that it was East Germany.  How did you land on that?

Natalie  
Well, it’s a couple of things. So maybe it would be helpful if I just very briefly describe my project. Essentially, my project focuses on this very provocative political and aesthetic youth magazine called “Twen” that was published between 1959 and 1971 in West Germany.  I essentially use this magazine as a lens to understand the political, social, and also cultural upheavals and changes of the 60s that were in large part being driven by a younger generation of people. That’s the case in Germany, but also in other places, like here in (the US). So some of those things encompass dealing with the Nazi past, demanding more grassroots democratic participation, confronting what people saw as a really kind of stuffy sexual morality, you know, sexual revolution, that’s a big part of my project. Breaking out of old patterns of thinking and feeling and, you know, throwing out all the old ways of doing things. So that’s very broadly, what my project does.

Chad  
I’m gonna have to hit you up privately about some suggested reading! Before we get too far afield into history, I did my due diligence before this interview- scanning your instagram feed.  I was scrolling through your postings and the photos you post are so well composed and I was curious what draws your eye?  What makes you go, “Ooo, I have to capture this”?

Natalie  
Oh!  Well, first of all, thank you. It really depends; sometimes I can just see what a shot would look like if I’m in a particular place or sometimes I just like observing people and what they’re doing. You will probably see some of my photos are like random people who don’t know I’m taking pictures of them.  I have this great one of these kids in Croatia playing- I don’t know, I just like observing what people are doing around me.

Chad  
Do you ever take any photos of the shop?

Natalie  
No….

Chad  
For fear of being creepy, because whipping your camera out and taking pictures of people working out can be kind of creepy?

Natalie  
I think I did take photos when we did the Strong Person Mini-Meet- to document everyone’s accomplishments.

Chad  
I got some good photos of you during that, because that is my job. I AM the creepy person who takes photos of people when they are working out. The other thing about looking at your Instagram feed is traveling to wonderful places. Has it been a tough year for you not traveling?

Natalie  
I was supposed to go to Australia last year; I try to go every two years so I can see family. But obviously that didn’t happen- that probably won’t happen until 2022. But yeah, it was hard to not travel, but I can’t complain.

Chad  
Do you have any travel on the docket now?

Natalie  
Yes, I do have a little bit planned for the near future. So after I submit all of my final materials, we’re going to Playa Del Carmen at (DBS member Juan Sequeda)’s suggestion.

Chad  
Nice! Something I wanted to ask you about was transitioning from Virtual classes when we were shut down back into in person classes.  Now that I know what a good photographer you are, it makes sense that you were so smooth in setting up your device over Zoom, but whereas some members were extra cautious and didn’t come back to in person classes until much later, you came back pretty much right away.  You were good at the virtual workouts and I know your boyfriend has a nice gym in his apartment, so what compelled you to come back to class at The Shop?

Natalie  
I hate working out at home by myself.  I think you guys did a really wonderful job of not just helping people continue their workouts, but also trying to bring together the community aspect virtually. That was awesome!  I just personally cannot stand working out at home by myself. Even if I had a full Dane’s Body Shop set up in my non-existent garage, I probably wouldn’t workout there. Especially because at that time I was writing my dissertation and not interacting with anybody. And so I would spend all day in my head thinking really difficult thoughts and trying to write something really complex. And so I need that at the end of the day- I need to go to The Shop. I need to see the people I know.

Chad  
Is it the space, is it the people, or is it the coaching?

Natalie  
All of it: the interacting with people/getting to know people aspect and I like the space because it’s not my house. I like to be in different places. But I also like the aggression of doing, like, a clean, you know?

Chad  
Okay, now that’s a really nice segue to the next bit I wanted to touch on. I have had many great interactions with you and one of them was you getting a PR on your clean by like 10 pounds or something like that. As I recall, I think that you didn’t get it on the first try-

Natalie  
Sometimes I get stuck in my own head.

Chad  
Yeah, that is what I wanted to ask- as someone who is in a field that requires rigorous analytical thinking, do you find that mindset to be beneficial when lifting?

Natalie  
Oh no!  If I’m in my head and overthinking things then I just need to call it for the day. The best times (for lifting) is when I’m like- and you’ll probably have to edit this out- when I get that “Fuck it!” confidence you know?

Chad  
No, you’re fine- we can go completely blue if you want.

Natalie  
Yeah?  I wish I knew that earlier! So yeah, when I’m not overthinking my hand position or where my shoulders are- that is when I have my best lift.

Chad  
My all time deadlift max happened after one very strong beer and a shot of whiskey at 10 in the morning. So yeah, I think there’s something to not overthinking. That’s great.  So in the next part of this interview we’re going to get into some random questions. One of my favorite memories of giving a tour to a prospective member was an interaction you had with a South African member named Jason- he has a very distinct South African accent.  He is wonderful and he is also a bit of a sonofabitch in the best possible way.  So as I was escorting you out of the facility, I briefly introduced the two of you saying some version of “Natalie is from Australia and Jason is from South Africa- those countries are kind of close aren’t they!?!?”.  And his response was: “Australia?  So now you guys are signing convicts up for members eh?”

Natalie  
*big laughter* I don’t remember that!  That’s fucking funny!

Chad  
Yeah, he totally generalized Australians as convicts! So I wanted to give you the opportunity here to throw shade at the South Africans. Are there any equivalent barbs you’d like to throw his way?

Natalie  
I wish that I had something fun for you. But I have no clue. I don’t remember having any beefs with South Africa growing up.

Chad  
“No beef with South Africa” might be the title of this interview. We’ll see. One of the questions that I’ll ask somewhat regularly, and I’m extra interested in with you, is if you could take a figure from history and have a dinner and discussion with them, who would it be?

Natalie  
This is so much pressure!  Oh man, this is like when people ask you a favorite movie and you just blank.

Chad  
Could be former coaches at Danes body shop like Mitch, you can throw Mitch in there if you want. He’s in Arizona though; the food’s not great.

Natalie  
Oh, I know! Here’s one you’ve never heard of: her name is Beate Uhse-Rotermund, I could spell that for you later. She was a pilot in the Luftwaffe, but that’s not the most interesting thing about her! After World War Two, she started Germany’s biggest erotica company; it started out selling contraceptives and all sorts of things. Then it expanded into a mail-order business that delivered erotica catalogs to people’s houses. And the reason that she’s so interesting is that after the war, at least on the official level, there was a very kind of strict sexual morality in terms of the nuclear family. (The Germans) had all these laws that prohibited public display of certain indecent materials, like in public and blah, blah, blah- and one of the loopholes of that law actually allowed mail order businesses to flourish, because people could consume sexual objects in their own homes and not disrupt public order or anything like that.  So, I would probably invite her to dinner to ask her about German erotica, but also as a woman heading up one of the biggest companies that, even to this day, still exists.

Chad  
That is an incredible answer. Okay, so continuing on this theme of the Wehrmacht and the Luftwaffa- and, you know, German secret serum and everything- if you were to be injected with a secret serum and become a super powered person, what sort of powers would you have? And would you be a villain or a hero?

Natalie  
Oh, man… I change my answer to this every time that I get asked the question.  Honestly, I would like to be able to, to use the Harry Potter term, to be able to apparate anywhere I want, when I want. Because how much more amazing would life be if you didn’t have to commute anywhere?  I need some guac from HEB and now I just click my fingers? Or just take a weekend in Paris?  I think that is the superior super power.  It is also better for the environment-


Chad
I don’t know- are we sure that apparating doesn’t leave an insane carbon footprint?

Natalie
In my imaginary world it doesn’t, so I guess that makes me a hero.

Chad
There you go!  Okay, if you were to describe yourself as a fruit or vegetable, which one would it be and why?

Natalie
Ohhhhh shit…

Chad
Shit?  Shit is your answer?

Natalie
*laughing* Shit is a fruit, you didn’t know that?  Hmmm…  Is avocado a fruit?

Chad
Yes it is!  And what qualities of an avocado represent you?  

Natalie
They’re very versatile, I can be sweet or I can be spicy, and everyone loves avocados- just kidding on that one!

Chad
People would apparate to HEB just to get you!  Also, hipsters could put you on toast.

Natalie
That actually makes sense because all Australians know how to make is avocado toast priced at $20 a pop.

Chad
What is your pettiest pet peeve?

Natalie
*laughing* Oh I have so many!  I’m the pettiest person.  When people don’t use their blinkers- but I think a lot of people hate that so that isn’t the pettiest.  I hate it when people stand too close to me.  *darkly* When people who don’t put their carts back at the store.  Ok no!  You can scratch all of that- my number one pet peeve is when people talk on speaker phone.  Any time, any place, I don’t want to hear it.

Chad
Do you think you could make it your mission to jump into the conversation any time someone is talking on speaker phone?  I think that is a great deterrent.

Natalie
Yeah!  Or yell something like “come back to bed!”.

Chad
Or “That looks infected!”.  That’s great.  Do you have a favorite swear word?

Natalie
I say “Fuckssake” a lot.  

Chad
Last random question: tell us something utterly surprising about you.  Someone who works out with you three or four times a week- what would be something they would not guess about you.

Natalie
I don’t know- I feel like I’m not that surprising.  Um… *really long and satisfying pause*. Oh, I play like a shit ton of Animal Crossing.

Chad
I think that is very surprising- I would not have guessed.  But I guess it makes sense; my wife was a big reader before she went to grad school and now she just wants to play like the Sims or whatever it is she is playing.

Natalie
Right?  You’ve got to balance it out!  There are so many things I want to read and I want to learn, but at the end of the day I’ve done that all day and what I really want to do is make my little beach island.  That’s all I want.

Chad
That’s nice!  Before we wrap this up, you have ascended to the Pantheon of Athletes of the Season-

Natalie
*sheepishly* I was so surprised!

Chad
Why do you think it happened?

Natalie
I don’t know… I really don’t.

Chad
The “why do you think it happened” one is a shitty question to ask, but I ask it because it gives me a chance to answer for you.  You’re dedicated, you come to class regularly, you were wonderful and regular while we were shut down and you came back with great spirit.  You interact with other people, you’re very present- you really were a slam dunk choice.

Natalie
Awww.  I appreciate that- that’s nice.

Chad
So do you have any words of advice for the community?  I think it was September of 2019 that I gave you a tour, so you’ve been here for almost two years.

Natalie
That is crazy!  Oh my god!  

Chad
Yeah, I think you were my first tour after moving back to Austin.  I remember worrying that my awkwardness had run you off because I was still getting my tour legs under me.  What advice would you give to a new potential member who had just had an awkward tour with me?

Natalie
Its okay, I’m awkward too!  Advice to a new person?

Chad
Yeah, about how they should approach The Shop.

Natalie
I am going to steal from Jack (Brown) here.  I remember in his interview he said, “everybody starts from somewhere”.  I think that is so important because I’ve been intimidated before by people who lift really heavy and really seem to know what they’re doing.  But everyone starts from somewhere and the community is very supportive, so have an open mind and get comfortable with being uncomfortable.  Yeah, I think that was really good advice, so I’m just stealing it.

Chad
From the mouths of babes- Jack is so young and so wise for a shirtless shoeless man.  Well Natalie, this has been a real pleasure!

As if I weren’t already looking forward to my Athlete Spotlight interview with Steven Hernandez and Marie Prendergast enough, my enchanting wife and I received an invitation to join them for homemade pizza and baked goodies at their house on the east side.  With the funky tunes of Steven’s beloved Red Hot Chili Peppers setting a background groove, we were treated to an evening of lovey dovey anecdotes and exceptional food!

 

Coach Chad: Can you guys tell a little bit about your first impression of one another?

Steven Hernandez:  I was impressed because she was there before me and I pride myself on being prompt-

Marie Prendergast:  That’s not how we met though.  We met on Ok Cupid.

So his first impression was analog and you first impression was digital?

SVH:  My first impression was that she got there before I did and I was like, alright!

MP:  I got there early because I had just started the online dating thing and I didn’t want to go through the awkwardness of who is going to pay.  So I got there extra early, paid for my beer and sat down.

That is a boss independent move!

SVH:  I very much respected that and so I went and grabbed my beer… and then more beers were had after that.

What was your first meaningful impression of him?

MP:  He was the first person to message me on OK Cupid- on the day that I signed up.  My profile was all about baking and he asked me “what is the thing that you’re most proud of having baked?”.  My favorite thing to bake are macarons because they are tough to make- so I feel accomplished after baking them.  I had baked a bunch right before our first date and he had recently gone to Japan, so I brought him green tea matcha macarons with chocolate ganache filling.

SVH: I ate most of them on the date because they were so good and I was like, “Oh man, I’m going to be in trouble!”.

MP:  So my first impression was that I thought he was good looking in his profile pictures, but when I met him I was like dayumn! you’re even more handsome than you are in photos!  That is not common.

So that was question one; question two is what was your first impression of Dane’s Body Shop?

MP:  Steven had been going for like a year when we met.  He kept talking about The Shop and how much he enjoyed it and said that I should join.  My impression was look at (SVH)!  You must have to be really strong and very athletic to join this gym!  But he kept saying I should try it, so I decided to try one class and if I didn’t die, then I’d join. So he paid for a drop-in for me and I went to a class, no tour or anything.  It was a John Gates Whitely class and I was scared and it was really really hard, but at the end I was like “well, I did it.  I feel pretty accomplished”- I might have even cried, but it was good enough that I immediately signed up for the full monthly membership after that and I’ve been going ever since.

SVH:  For me, I remembered when they started remodeling (The Manor Road Shop) which was formerly a dry-cleaners-

Which, by the way, I tried to convince Dane to call the Manor Road location “Dane’s Power Clean” because of that.

MP:  Oh, that’s hilarious!

Wifey Becca:  I think that “Dane’s Clean and Press” would be better.

MP:  No actually I like that better too!

SVH: Both would have been great!  I thought it was like a Crossfit gym and I didn’t really want to do that, but eventually after driving by a bunch and seeing what people were doing I decided to inquire.  I emailed John Gates Whiteley: that is where the nickname SVH came from- I was teaching at UT at the time and would sign my emails SVH just as a brief thing, but John just started calling me SVH in the early correspondence.  I told him that I had had a rough year and just wanted to change some things about my physical and mental approach.  Then I met with Dane and Pete Tulumba-

Wifey Becca: COACH PETER!!!

SVH:  We could only meet right before class and so it was just me and the two of them which was really intimidating because they are both so fit.  When class started, it was packed and they were doing hang cleans which reminded me of playing football.  So about a month later I signed up and the rest is history!  As intimidating as it seemed at the moment, it also seemed very familiar because of football- but it wasn’t filled with pressure and competitive, it was very communal and supportive.  Everyone I met in the first 100 days at Dane’s are like now invited to our wedding!

Remind me when that is?

Wifey Becca:  You do not need to put that in there!  Are you going to ask for the location too?

Yes!  And what is your social security number?

SVH: 9-7-

STOP, Steven Stop!!!  Those are both really fun answers.  I want to get back to another question about you two- what is your favorite way in which your sweet little fiancee shows love?

SVH:  This is going to sound dumb, but it is when she gets interested in a Dallas Cowboy Football game.  If she’s like “That was a great run by Ezekiel Elliot”, I’m like “Oh my god baby, that was a great run by Ezekiel Elliot!”.

MP:  We recently watched the Euro Cup Tournament and he was rooting for England because they were the underdog, but I have Italian citizenship, so I was rooting hard for them.  It kept getting more and more heated and he was like, “Baby I love that you’re getting so passionate!.”

Oooo Spicy!  What is it that Steven does for you?

MP:  My love language is quality time and we spend a lot of time together.  It did get to the point in the pandemic where we were literally only seeing each other and we did get a little sick of one another… but it took a really long time to get there!  So quality of time is important to me and so is acts of service and he keeps the house really clean.  He’s very thoughtful.  Also, I’ve never been super into receiving gifts- I like giving them, but receiving hasn’t been a big deal- but he gives amazing gifts!  He got me personal training sessions at The Shop!  For my birthday this year, it was the pandemic and so he knew I wouldn’t be comfortable going out for a fancy dinner and so he hired a personal chef to come to our house and cook us a four course dinner of my favorite foods!  How genius is he?

That is lovely!   I’ve got a few more superficial questions and then we will get into some completely random ones.  What is the sexiest exercise to watch one another do at The Shop?

SVH:  Squats!  Any squats- anything that puts that badonkadonk down and picks it right up again!

MP:  I like watching him do high box jumps!  You know what is not sexy?  The deadlift.  When he goes for a PR his face gets all red and he kind of looks like he’s going to pass out.  While it is very impressive, it isn’t sexy.

And that is a sign of good form!  I tell people that if they look attractive when they are doing a heavy deadlift, they aren’t doing it right.

SVH:  Well I listen to all of my coaches at Dane’s Body Shop- Chad and Dane and Pete-

Oh Steven, you don’t have to plug us- you already gained Athlete Spotlight status!  Ok, so you’re getting married soon- who is driving the planning of the wedding?

SVH: *zero hesitation* Marie.

MP:  Oh yeah!

SVH:  But I did insist on the colors-

DALLAS COWBOY COLORS???

SVH:  Yeah baby!

MP:  Silver and blue- those are good colors!

HOW BOUT DAT WEDDING?!?!?!

SVH: Yeah, so I picked the colors and let her decide everything else-

MP: Not everything!  We are using the venue that you wanted and we agreed on the food together-

SVH: Burgers and Eastside Pies- very non traditional.  And yard games- can jam, corn hole-

This does sound dreamy.  Outside of working out at Dane’s Body Shop, what activities bring the most joy and fulfillment to your life?

MP: I love baking-

I figured we would hit on that!  Which by the way, what is this delicious caramelized thing I’m eating right now?

MP:  It’s called a Florentine and it has orange extract and chopped candied ginger.  I love baking- Steven actually helped to turn the spare room into a prep room for my side hustle-

SVH:  #bakedfromscratchatx

I’m all about plugging in these interviews!

MP: I’ve been baking my whole life- I started to learn from my Italian Grandmother.  She didn’t have many successful bakes so I had to figure out a lot on my own, but one of my favorite things was bringing something like a panettone to her.  Her Italian accent would come out-

*In an absurd Italian accent* Oh Marie, you make-ah my life so happy!

MP:  Yeah, a little less Mario than that.

Nope, she was eating pasta and had a big thick mustache when this happened.

MP:  I’m baking my way through an Italian cookbook and there are 75 recipes, so it has been a lot of Italian Desserts.

SVH:  I’m surprised I’m not obese at the moment.

MP:  It’s because you workout at Dane’s… Body…. Shop!

And what do you do for joy SVH?

SVH:  Now this is going to sound like a plug- but it has been working out.  It has always been a way to exorcise whatever day’s demons had encroached on me.  Lately though, I’ve been into golf.  The fact that I can out drive (Shop Operations Director) John Gates Whiteley.

And that is the important thing!

SVH: Yeah, with one year of golf under my belt I can beat John who has had decades of golfing.  I kid, I kid!  Golfing was something I could do in the pandemic and it was also something that gave me patience.  It is a game where you can have a bunch of bad shots, but then you can have a couple good shots; it helps me to remember to look at the positive side of things and not always the negatives.  It helped me to become more of a positive person.  Also, you’re with friends!  Just out in a glorious park, maybe sipping some beverages and having some good conversation.

I’m going to pair up the next two questions and you can answer them separately or as one question: why is fitness important in one’s life? and why is love important?

SVH:  Fitness, for me, brings balance through the stresses of the day.  I can go to the gym and have the stress washed away because I’ve taken it out on the weights or the mats- whatever we’re doing that day.  Love… keeps you grounded.  Love helps you to remember why the day is important and it doesn’t mask the bad things in life.

So fitness is sort of your reaction to the tough things in life and love is-

SVH: Remembering what is good in life.

I like that, that’s cool!  What’s your answer Marie?

Wifey Becca: Can we just let the record reflect that Marie just smiled the most beautiful smile while he gave that answer?

That’s the perfect Ed McMahon moment for you Becca.  Good job.

MP:  *Bashfully* Fitness is important to me because I’m a really competitive person- I grew up the youngest of four and my brothers are basically geniuses, so I have a lot to live up to.  We played a lot of board games and trivia which was challenging and I like having that challenge.  Taking classes at Dane’s, as opposed to working out alone, offers that kind of challenge and keeps things interesting.  It helps me to get better.  I get to finish a day and feel like I’ve accomplished something.  And then love is important because it is what makes each day good.

Is there a contrast or comparison you could draw between your fitness accomplishments and your love accomplishments? … Wow, I phrased that in an exceptionally weird way!

MP: *laughing* Oh, I’ve loved x amount more today than yesterday!  No it is just so wonderful to have someone who is completely supportive, particularly during those times that I fail at a challenge or am getting in my head.  He is just so loving and reminds me that I don’t have to compete with anyone else.  Supporting one another and growing together.

It sounds like you both come from a place where fitness is the space where you push yourself and love is where you allow yourself to feel safe.

MP: Yeah, exactly.

Now transitioning to some more random questions- what is your all time pump up jam?

MP:  Mine is “My Body” by Young The Giant.  Any time you get tired in a workout, you throw that on and the lyrics, “My body tells me no, but I won’t quit because I want more”!

SVH:  I got it… *proceeds to slowly turn up the volume on the music that has been set to a background level, revealing a funktastic Red Hot Chili Peppers song* It is not on any Chili Pepper album you can find- it is a b-side.  It is kind of a secret song.

Marie, as a baker, and as we sit here enjoying your delicious baked goods-

Wifey Becca: I had two cookies!

What is your favorite “treat yourself” food or drink?

SVH: I love a burger from Crown and Anchor- even if it only costs $6, it tastes like it costs $60!  That is my favorite burger in town.

Wifey Becca: *dreamily* their fries are really good too.

SVH:  My god!  The fries complement the burger so well that you almost want another burger!

MP: And they hold up in delivery!  We definitely favored some of those during the pandemic.  I am all about Karah’s Diavolo w/ house parm cheese from Patrizis.  

That pasta is absolutely insane.  Which coach at Dane’s Body Shop would you most want to see on a reality show and which reality show would that be?

SVH:  Oh man… I would love to see John Gates Whiteley on “Naked and Afraid”.

But to be clear, you aren’t saying you want to see John naked right?

MP: I don’t know, Steven might!

SVH:  Oh no!

MP: He just wants to see him afraid!

That is great!  Marie?  I’m sure you’ve watched plenty of baking shows.

MP: Well I don’t know who is good at baking!  

Let me reframe the question: let’s pretend like it is MTV’s The Real World and all of the coaches are living together in an apartment, who do you think would freak out the most-

MP: John!  I think he’d get tired of ya’ll real fast.

Final question!  You two are now members of the pantheon of Spotlight Athletes: do you have words of wisdom to those who may come after you?

SVH:  Patience!  I was here forever before I was Athlete of the Season!  Seriously though, it is about being a community and not being competitive.  Making friends for life and understanding that the people around you are in the same boat as you and all they want to do is better themselves.  Anything you do to uplift them, just acknowledging how hard a workout was or complementing their lift, goes a long way in building relationships and bettering the community.

MP:  You can also take your engagement photos at The Shop and then Dane’s will be guilted into making you an Athlete Spotlight! *laughing*

Okay Okay!  The question was more general advice, not suggesting ways to game the system!  You two actually earned it!  Marie, you had that experience of coming to The Shop and not thinking of yourself as an athletic person- any advice for those people?

MP:  Just keep showing up!  There will be days that you feel like you made improvement and there will be days where muscles hurt and you feel exhausted.  Days where you don’t understand how to do a power clean, and you hate them, and you’ve done them so many times, and you get corrected every time, and you get different corrections from different coaches(!)…  but then eventually you get to the point where you really do get how to do a power clean and one of the coaches says, “wow, that was a really great power clean!” and then you feel so good inside.

Weather the storm?

MP:  Just keep swimming!

And to that I’ll just add the advice to make friends with Steve and Marie so that you can come to their house and have delicious homemade pizza.

MP:  And cupcakes and cookies!

Lauren and I met in Mueller Lake Park on a breezy afternoon for a conversation that was top notch with respect to content and honestly, the audio was amazing as well!  Given that Lauren is a podcast empresario, we may end up releasing the audio of this interview at some point!  If you’re looking for a sterling example of making the best out of a pandemic- from overindulging in Mexican Martinis to chancing into a grad school program, to inventive ways of making human contact hygienically, this conversation is a can’t miss!

Coach Chad: I think the first question that I wanted to ask you, Lauren Lichterman is-

Lauren Lichterman: Is it on?

Oh, we’re recording!

We goin’!  Woo!

So it is April 14th today and about a year ago your world changed more dramatically than most people I know with respect to what their plans were versus what actually ended up happening.  Can you talk to me a little bit about what you planned on doing in the Spring of 2020 and what actually happened?

*giggling knowingly*  So… I had quit my job that I had had for 10 years-

Which was?

Working in the University of Texas Athletics Department- Hook em horns!  I had been there for a decade working in facilities and events and I reached a limit.  I loved it, it was great, but one can only work 60-80 hour weeks for so long.  So I quit my job, didn’t know what I was going to do, and formulated this idea based around a conference in London that I was going to go to in March of 2020.  I figured since I was unemployed and had some savings, why would I come back?

Makes perfect sense!

So my original plan was to get on a plane on March 14th with a one way ticket to London and then just travel and volunteer around the world for the next year or two.  That didn’t pan out…

Wait, why didn’t that pan out?

Unfortunately this little thing called Covid hit the entire world-

Ahhhh yes, that!

We had a pandemic and all the borders to countries started closing on March 13th, so literally a 12 hour difference and I might have been stuck in London.  I would have had to buy a very expensive ticket back or to find an AirBnB in London and-

and start working on your cockney accent?

And do nothing!  Just being trapped in London- there are obviously worse places to be.

Can you do a British accent by the way?

Oh I am the worst at accents-

Do one anyway!

Uh… Chip, chip cheerio!  *laughing* Cheers to the gov’nah!  *dear readers, she really isn’t that bad!  I’d give her a C-!*

Good job!  What went through your mind when this happened I thought about you so much.  For me, I don’t do well with plans being messed up because I’m mildly obsessive compulsive.  I would have been destroyed.

It was not pleasant.  For a while I was convinced that I was still going to go and that it would all blow over *sardonic laughter*.  A handful of very concerned and stern friends talked me off of getting on a plane.  I am very obsessive about making plans too, so it was very surprising that I had booked such an open trip.  So for the rest of March I was just drunk for like two weeks.  I was going to pity party for 4 or 5 days and then give myself a cut-off point for being mad.  But at that point I had literally nothing to do!

I feel like I remember hearing the phrase “passed out in a kiddy pool in my driveway on Cinco de Mayo”?

That happened!  I made Trudy’s Mexican Martinis and didn’t have much of a direction at that point.  So I was going to travel the world but I ended up working at Home Depot instead, so things really worked out for the better!

When life hands you lemonade, make lemons eh?

Exactly!  It was not my favorite- I made it a month.

I was lucky enough to be in phone and texting contact with you throughout all of this, and it was my perception that you never really bottomed out.  You seemed to be in as good of a headspace as any of us at the time.  Is that true?  Do you feel like you kept a pretty decent head on your shoulders?

I think I did.  I guess if the rest of the world hadn’t also been suffering then it might have been harder to digest that my world imploded.  Most people were way worse off than me- I had savings.  I had friends lose jobs, people’s daily lives got disrupted- I did not have a daily life.

That is an incredible amount of self awareness and graciousness.  I feel like that could have been a really dark time for you and the way you handled it was actually quite inspirational to me.  Like Lauren is keeping her shit together, so why not keep my shit together.

Thanks! *bashful laughter*

Were there any dark moments you wanted to highlight, because otherwise I’m going to move along.

I think the dark moment was the day after Cinco de Mayo when I thought maybe I was dying.  I didn’t pass out!  I fell in the Kiddy Pool.  I don’t remember a lot of that day- I had a lot of Zooms going on.  I am normally a very responsible drunk and apparently I couldn’t figure out how to unplug the kiddy pool.

I wanted to point to the brighter side because through all of this, your life hit a major inflection point.  Your life pivoted completely during the height of the pandemic.  Can you talk about that?

Yeah!  Early mid-May I got an opportunity to go to grad school and become a research assistant in sports sustainability and to get my Masters in sports management- which is ironically something I have said that I would never ever, ever, ever do- going back to school.  But when you have literally nothing going on in life and an expert in your field reaches out and says they want to work with you, grab that bull by the horns!

Hook’em!

Right- and the only downside is the program is at A&M which is a bit of an inner conflict.

Gig’em?

They do say that.  So because of the pandemic, most of the coursework is remote so I didn’t need to move to College Station.  So now I am in the academic world!  It is very different to be in an academic program with twenty-two year olds-

You mean people of the age twenty-two right? Not like twenty two years?

*laughing* Correct!

Not a grad program for toddlers?

I clear the next oldest person by five years- I’m closer in age to all of my professors than anyone in my cohort.

So that isn’t just thriving in spite of the pandemic, it sounds like you were attuned to possibilities that happened because of the pandemic.

Absolutely!

Now one of the more serious questions the coaches wanted me to ask you was Beth Reyburn wanted to know how you got into sustainability.  And this might be a good time for you to tag on a mini bio of yourself.

I grew up recycling and caring about the environment and didn’t think too much about it until I got into my full time job with Texas Athletics.  I had originally been hired to create and manage their customer service program on game days for different sports.  I randomly got invited to a meeting with the sustainability office on campus.  They wanted to build a tailgate recycling program and asked if I could support it.  So for the first couple years I was just in a support role but I ended up, in collaboration with the office of sustainability, building out this massive Texas Athletics sustainability program.  Our main focus has been in zero waste, so I’ve jumped in lots of dumpsters and I’ve touched lots of trash-

So you have to have a killer immune system!

I have to!  Yeah, there’s been some gross trash- rancid meat day, rainbow spills (which is our code for vomit at events).  So yeah, just by happenstance- good timing and networking.  They gave me the autonomy to work on (sustainability) as long as I got my other work done.  So I got grant funding and sponsorships.  What I love about it is that it is important for the world and it is a challenge all of the time- there is always something to fix in building sustainability.  I’ve loved puzzles all my life- I got caught doing a puzzle during class today!  And then I’ve found that I need meaning in my work- I need to be doing something for the common good in order to be motivated to do it.

That is great.  For someone who has eyes trained on sustainability I have two questions: a. what is the most common violation of sustainability protocol and b. what is the most egregious?

I wonder if they are one in the same?  The most common is paper.  People don’t know what to do with paper.  Paper towels, specifically, are not recyclable and everyone thinks they are.  They have a conditioner in them that makes them function as paper towels-

People really think that?

Yes! I mean you would recycle newspaper if it got a little wet, you’d recycle computer paper if it got a little wet- but you don’t use those things as paper towels!  So that is a huge misconception people have of paper towels.

And a huge misconception you have of me is that I actually do use computer paper to dry my hands.

No you don’t!

I like the way it feels.

How many paper cuts do you have?

So many!  I’m a bad boy and I like to remind myself that I’m a bad boy.  Okay, so people not knowing what to do with paper.  What makes you the most angry?  What is flagrant and egregious?

What immediately came to mind is greenwashing.  Companies will spend their marketing dollars telling you that they’re doing good stuff for the environment but they are actually spending more money on the marketing than the thing itself.

Wow!

You see it with Exxon and BP, Coca Cola- they are trying to tell you that they are doing good and to put the onus on the individual to be more sustainable when they are actually the biggest offenders.  There aren’t a lot of common definitions for materials, so they can use “compostable” or “biodegradable” as they wish and there is no regulation.  It pisses me off to no end.  You’ll have to cut me off on this in a second, but you know “reduce, reuse, recycle”?  That is a hierarchy, you should reduce first and then reuse and then recycle. Most people think “recycle, recycle, recycle” because Coca Cola has put a shit ton of marketing dollars in telling you that you need to recycle stuff so that you will buy their plastic and aluminum.

And there are other  reasons to not drink Coca Cola- like health.  That is a great segue!  Lauren, how did you get into health and fitness?

I grew up playing sports.  I had never been into working out for fun, it was just a necessity because that is how sports work.  I had a roommate years ago- however long I’ve been a member, seven years?- who worked out at Dane’s and when she came to live with me asked me if I’d like to join.  I figured if I was going with a friend, I would see what it was like.  And of course, as anyone who has been to Dane’s knows, you’re instantly hooked.

What is the hook?

Chad.  It is you.

I wasn’t even there when you started!

Ugh, who was my instant hook?  That was like Dunte and Lee Anne and Andrew Key-

Oh… your hook was Andrew’s abs.

And his smile.

Yep, we are a very vapid and surfacey community here.

*laughing* Oh, that is totally what they say about us.  I was very much a Fusion class only person at first.  I made amazing friends and people were so cool.  I did a “get fit” month through the Shop and they suggested working some Strength classes in.  I was super intimidated, but I will never forget the first class I went to; Shelly Nall and Carmen Gaddis invited me to join their rack.  I was so relieved!  These two women in the Strength class were being nice to me and we are still great friends to this day.  They were so encouraging and nice.

This is just like the scene in Forrest Gump when he goes on the bus and Jenny says he can sit with her.

YES!  One hundred percent!  Shout out to those wonderful ladies.  Again it was an instant hook- I never thought I’d be someone who enjoyed the self challenge of Strength and getting new maxes and competing with yourself. But it is such an encouraging community and now I feel like I am more of a Strength than a Fusion person.  I talk about “church of Keith” and “disciple of Keith” like so many of us are.

I want to dig into that a little further- what is so stimulating about the idea of competing with yourself?

As I mentioned with sustainability, I’m a person who likes challenges.  Most people know I don’t gravitate toward cardio challenges-

You actually have this cool move you will do where you will take back to back classes and work really hard in Strength and then just stand around talking to people in Fusion rather than working out.

*roaring with laughter*  Oh I do some of the work out.  At least half!

Sometimes… I’ve seen it both ways.  But I endorse it!

It is also about who is your coach?  That is another thing I love about Dane’s- all the coaches have different personalities and types of motivation.  Depending on how I’m feeling in a day, there are different coaches I want to see.  If I’m feeling like stretching and just doing any sort of movement, Bean is going to be my support for that because she is so great at modifying.  If I really need to have my ass kicked, it is Beth Reyburn’s class- 100% that is where I am going because she won’t let me slack off at all.  I really love that you can get whatever you want.

What mindset propels you into my class?

Well, I get a butt bump!

There we go!  For our listeners, that is very much non-pornographic.  This is a Covid thing where we have taken the “ebola elbow” and turned it into what I call the “Covid cullo”.  We can’t hug one another so we tap butts.

And it has been wonderful.

It really has, I love butt bumping with you Lauren.

I butt bump with other people, but you are my primary butt bump partner.  You really are.

I love that we are poly-assmorous.  

That is perfect!  I don’t know that I’ve ever butt-bumped Dane.  That would be an interesting experience.

That is your challenge for the week!  You need to butt bump Dane.  That is actually a great segue into some random questions and questions asked by coaches.  Autumn asked a question, and I thought she was going in the direction of the classic KFM question directed at coaches-

What?  Oh!  Oh…. yeah. *knowing laughter*

But she framed it in a more family friendly way.  So amongst the coaches, let’s not make any members uncomfortable, choose: a. one person to go out for the night with; dinner, clubbing, whatever b. one person to go on a long weekend with- hang out for a week or so and c. a coach to be your roommate- someone you’d want to live with for a year or two.

Ooooo….  That is good!  Clubbing is you, hands down.  We’ve actually talked about that multiple times in recent conversations. When can we go to Barbarella/ can we turn the new Hyde Park Shop into a club.  So that is an easy one.  Weekend getaway?  Any coach.  But probably Bean.  I feel like she’d be a good combo of doing activities and just chilling.

Absolutely.  I think she’d be a great choice.  My only counterpoint is that she’d also be great for the last category.

Yeah…  So the last category would be Stormie.  We used to work together and have many similarities. Stormie would be good because socializing would be easy and we have enough in common.  I think it would be great.

Yeah.  And her heroin addiction isn’t totally obvious.  People don’t know about it-

Well I actually started her on that.  It is something we do together. I wasn’t going to bring that up. *big laughter*

Pass the needle- that is perfect!  Another question came from Stormie actually.  When are you going to stop bailing on her 6am classes?

*roaring with laughter*  I knew it!

How often are you doing this to her?

Honestly, like every week.

Stormie, you aren’t alone- she does it to me too!

I try not to bail on anyone‘s classes.

But if you do, you prefer to bail on Stormie’s?

No! It just happens that stuff comes up on Tuesday morning.  If I do miss one of her classes, I try to make it up later in the week.  Listen, I’m trying!

Come on Stormie- ease up off our girl!  Beth Reyburn wanted to know if you’ve ever met anyone more extroverted than you?

Ha!  I’m sure I have… no one is coming to mind.

This is the least quick you’ve answered anything.

You’re pretty extroverted- I don’t know if it is out of necessity…

It’s just my job.  If I had my way, I would never speak to another human again, but for some reason I chose a job where I have to talk to all the humans all the time.

*laughing* maybe it is me.  All of my friends joke that no matter where I go I meet someone I know and I feel compelled to talk to people.  Why wouldn’t I though?  Maybe it is me.

I’ve never seen anyone as comfortable talking to strangers as you are.  This is a great time to mention that you and another member, Erika Bsumek, ran a voter registration drive last fall.  You spearheaded the thing while Erika and I just hung back- you would just approach anyone walking by and ask them if they were registered to vote.

I think that is part of my profession- as part of the stadium tour program, I literally had to talk to anyone who comes into my presence, whether they want to yell at me or thank me or ask me a question.

Speaking of talking to strangers, I’ve been wanting to work in a plug for you!  You have a podcast called “Tell Me More About That”.  You aren’t talking to strangers, but it definitely features your gift of gab.  I’ve got two questions- the first one is, what is your favorite thing about running a long-form conversation podcast?

Um… I just like hanging out with my friend Mackenzie.  We had thought about a podcast a couple years ago and then the pandemic happened and it was something to keep us engaged.  We’re both people who like to learn new things and ask questions.  It has been cool to cover topics that we want to talk about.  We actually are recording this weekend- I’m covering Kate Winslet and she is covering the real life human who Leo’s character (from the film Titanic) was based on.

That’s cool. *begins singing “My Heart Will Go On”-

That is definitely going to need to stay in the interview.

Kate and Leo were technically the stars, but we all know Celine was the real star of that film.  Piggybacking off of that, you’re in your second season of the podcast.  Of all the people that you’ve covered or are planning to cover, who would you most like to have on your podcast?

Ohhh…  That’s a really good question.   You’ll appreciate this, but the first person I thought of was Abraham Lincoln-

FUCK YEAH!

We don’t always cover people– I would love to talk to an octopus.  They are fascinating.  And also, I want people listening to this to know Chad came up with the sub-series for the podcast, and has been a guest on the pod; it is called “Tell Me Even More About That”.  We did an episode called American Dads because Tom Hanks and Abe Lincoln are distantly related.  Chad came on and told us his top five takes on our episode and told us more about Lincoln!

And it was fun!  I had several friends and family members who listened to it, loved it, and thought you ladies did a great job.

You were a blast!  If anyone else wants to be on, let me know!

Listen to the podcast and hit them up if you have something to add!

If there are any marine biologists out there that would be awesome!

That would be killer.  I think we’re getting close to wrapping this up and we have covered so much information in a short time.  Do you have any questions to pose to the coaching staff?  They came pretty aggressively with questions for you.  Also any members you have questions for?

This is a silly thing, but it is the first thing that came to mind- when are they going to replace the (teensy and jenky) white rack in the Strength room at Hyde Park with a real rack?

I’m going to just answer this one with my educated guess… never!

Well it works and as a person who supports sustainability, I respect that.

The Shop has to rank pretty high in terms of sustainable practices right?

Absolutely!  I’m trying to think of questions, but because I talk a lot, I have probably already asked them.  As far as members, I was at Manor one morning and I don’t know as many people there.  I was working out next to someone and the coach introduced us.  The person responded by saying they were really introverted.

Good on them for calling it out!

Props to you!  I could have annoyed the crap out of you and you would have been miserable.  Thank you for telling me!  I’m capable of not talking- I just don’t do it often.  I don’t have a question for that member, I just want to say I respect the hell out of you.

Open-ended, I’ll throw it out for that member to contact me, chad@danesbodyshop.com, and if you have any questions for Lauren, like what the hell did you have to drink before you came to class?, let me know!  Well wrapping up, I like to finish with words of wisdom since you are now in the pantheon of Athlete Spotlights.  Specifically, I’d like to frame this as, because you made such a remarkable pivot during this difficult time do you have any advice for turning lemons into lemonade?

It is certainly easier said than done, but you can choose to see the glass half full.  Sometimes being miserable is unavoidable, but once you get out of that you can choose to find the gratitude in your life.  Copying (former DBS member and former Spotlight Athlete) Chelsea Bunn, I started making a construction paper gratitude chain.  I write a gratitude on a piece of paper, particularly when I’m having a down day, and I have it hanging in my house as a physical reminder of how much I have to be grateful for.  And actually last week I think I had two Chad classes and I wrote after the second class that I was grateful for two classes with Chad and all the butt bumps.

Aw….

I was having a particularly rough week last week and getting to see you twice, I was grateful for that.

That’s too heartwarming!  Now how often do you have to burn off links on the chain because you had two Chad classes???

*big laughter*  Never!

So finding the gratitude?

Yeah, choosing to see the glass half full because we all have things that we can be grateful for even if they are hard to see.  When I didn’t get to go on that trip I reminded myself that I had a roof over my head, I was able to feed myself, my family was healthy, and that was what really mattered.

Now really quick, Dane’s Body Shop coaches: kill, f***, marry?

AHHHHH!!!

And we stop recording now!